{"id":65976,"date":"2022-01-14T07:48:04","date_gmt":"2022-01-14T06:48:04","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wie-beziehungen-funktionieren\/"},"modified":"2026-05-05T07:34:20","modified_gmt":"2026-05-05T05:34:20","slug":"wie-beziehungen-funktionieren","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/wie-beziehungen-funktionieren\/","title":{"rendered":"How relationships work &#8211; These 11 myths destroy love"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span data-tcb-events=\"\"><img alt='Standard Blog-Post' src='https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/6a4c6b6669af197cf3ed4086bb9bc3968c59737b7f53282f91990b1d0adc7740?s=256&#038;d=https%3A%2F%2Fb3247eyo-a.myrdbx.io%2Fwp-content%2Fplugins%2Fthrive-visual-editor%2Feditor%2Fcss%2Fimages%2Fauthor_image.png&#038;r=g' srcset='https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/6a4c6b6669af197cf3ed4086bb9bc3968c59737b7f53282f91990b1d0adc7740?s=512&#038;d=https%3A%2F%2Fb3247eyo-a.myrdbx.io%2Fwp-content%2Fplugins%2Fthrive-visual-editor%2Feditor%2Fcss%2Fimages%2Fauthor_image.png&#038;r=g 2x' class='avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo tve_image' height='256' width='256'  data-d-f=\"author\" title=\"Standard Blog-Post\" width=\"500\" height=\"500\" loading='lazy' decoding='async'\/><\/span><span data-shortcode=\"tcb_post_author_name\" data-shortcode-name=\"Author name\" data-extra_key=\"\" data-attr-link=\"1\" data-attr-target=\"0\" data-attr-rel=\"0\" data-option-inline=\"1\" data-attr-static-link=\"{&quot;className&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/author\/jgastner\/&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;Dr. Judith Gastner&quot;,&quot;data-css&quot;:&quot;tve-u-192dfbea77e&quot;,&quot;class&quot;:&quot;&quot;}\" data-attr-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea77e\" style=\"text-decoration: none;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/author\/jgastner\/\" title=\"Dr. Judith Gastner\">Dr. Judith Gastner<\/a><\/span><span style=\"\">Paartherapeutin und Psychotherapeutin<\/span><span style=\"\">Category:<\/span><span data-attr-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea774\" data-attr-link=\"1\" data-attr-rel=\"0\" data-attr-static-link=\"{&quot;className&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/category\/beziehung-partnerschaft\/&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;Relationship &amp; Partnership&quot;,&quot;data-css&quot;:&quot;tve-u-192dfbea774&quot;,&quot;class&quot;:&quot;&quot;}\" data-attr-target=\"0\" data-extra_key=\"\" data-option-inline=\"1\" data-shortcode=\"tcb_post_categories\" data-shortcode-name=\"List of categories\" style=\"\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/category\/beziehung-partnerschaft\/\" title=\"Relationship &amp; Partnership\">Relationship &amp; Partnership<\/a><\/span><span>Article last updated on <span data-attr-date-format=\"j. F Y\" data-attr-date-format-select=\"custom\" data-attr-link=\"0\" data-attr-rel=\"0\" data-attr-show-time=\"0\" data-attr-target=\"0\" data-attr-time-format=\"\" data-attr-time-format-select=\"g:i a\" data-attr-type=\"modified\" data-extra_key=\"\" data-option-inline=\"1\" data-shortcode=\"tcb_post_published_date\" data-shortcode-name=\"Post date\">12. Dezember 2025 <\/span><\/span><strong><span style=\"\">Quality assurance<\/span><\/strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/prof-dr-ludwig-schindler\/\" style=\"outline: none;\"><span>Prof. Dr. Dr. Ludwig Schindler<\/span><\/a><span style=\"\">Share this article \ud83d\udc47\ud83c\udffb<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/wa.me\/?text=https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wie-beziehungen-funktionieren\/\" target=\"_blank\"><\/a><a href=\"mailto:?subject=Wie Beziehungen funktionieren&amp;body=Ich habe diesen interessanten Artikel gefunden: https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wie-beziehungen-funktionieren\/\" target=\"_blank\"><\/a><a href=\"https:\/\/t.me\/share\/url?url=https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wie-beziehungen-funktionieren\/&amp;text=Ich habe diesen interessanten Artikel gefunden:\" target=\"_blank\"><\/a><a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/intent\/tweet?url=https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wie-beziehungen-funktionieren\/&amp;text=Ich habe diesen interessanten Artikel gefunden:\" target=\"_blank\"><\/a><a href=\"#\" target=\"_blank\"><\/a>[tcb-script]document.addEventListener(&#8220;DOMContentLoaded&#8221;, function() {    const copyLinks = document.querySelectorAll(&#8220;.copy-link&#8221;);    copyLinks.forEach(link =&gt; {        link.addEventListener(&#8220;click&#8221;, function(event) {            event.preventDefault();            const textToCopy = &#8220;https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wie-beziehungen-funktionieren\/&#8221;;            navigator.clipboard.writeText(textToCopy).then(function() {                alert(&#8220;Link wurde in die Zwischenablage kopiert!&#8221;);            }).catch(function(error) {                alert(&#8220;Fehler beim Kopieren des Links: &#8221; + error);            });        });    });});[\/tcb-script]<span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Drawing of a couple lovingly gazing at each other while standing separately on two mountains.\" data-id=\"59333\" data-init-width=\"800\" data-init-height=\"260\" src=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/09\/Artikel-Header-Wie-Beziehungen-funktionieren.jpg\" data-width=\"734\" data-height=\"238\" width=\"734\" height=\"238\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 800 \/ 260;\" title=\"How does a relationship work properly?\" loading=\"lazy\"><\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><em><em>A happy relationship is demonstrably the most important factor for health and life satisfaction &#8211; all the more surprising is that very few couples (either individually or together) take a closer look at how a happy relationship actually works.<\/em><\/em><\/p>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"\" data-id=\"59982\" width=\"30\" data-init-width=\"150\" height=\"30\" data-init-height=\"150\" title=\"PaarBalance Divider Icon\" src=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/09\/PaarBalance-Divider-Icon.png\" data-width=\"30\" data-height=\"30\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 150 \/ 150;\" loading=\"lazy\"><\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"\"><strong>\u261d\ud83c\udffb Quick Start: How Relationships Work&nbsp;<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"\"><span style=\"\"><strong>Arguments \u2013 a cleansing storm or a relationship killer?&nbsp;<\/strong> Frequent arguments usually leave more wounds than they heal. Learn how to effectively address conflicts without further straining your relationship. <a href=\"#tve-jump-191fe4dcf5d\">Find out more here. \u2193<\/a><br \/><\/span><\/li>\n<li><span><strong>Control and mistrust destroy trust:<\/strong> Trust forms the foundation of every relationship. <a href=\"#tve-jump-191fe4e2d1b\" style=\"outline: none;\">Learn here<\/a> why control is counterproductive and how you can create an open and trusting atmosphere. \u2193<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span><strong>Affection can grow:<\/strong> Love isn&#8217;t a fixed feeling that either exists or it doesn&#8217;t. Discover how you can actively nurture affection and deepen your relationship emotionally \u2013 for more affection and togetherness \u2013 <a href=\"#tve-jump-191fe4e73d5\" style=\"outline: none;\">read on here. \u2193<\/a><\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"\" data-id=\"59982\" width=\"30\" data-init-width=\"150\" height=\"30\" data-init-height=\"150\" title=\"PaarBalance Divider Icon\" src=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/09\/PaarBalance-Divider-Icon.png\" data-width=\"30\" data-height=\"30\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 150 \/ 150;\" loading=\"lazy\"><\/span><\/p>\n<p>As couple therapists ( <a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/die-wissenschaft-hinter-paarbalance\/\" style=\"outline: none;\">more about us here<\/a> ) we are confronted daily with the fact that many people are quite wrong in several of their assumptions about what constitutes a happy partnership and a fulfilling relationship &#8211; with sometimes fatal consequences.<\/p>\n<p><strong>We want you to become your own relationship expert for your existing partnership and to (re)discover how to revive the good feelings from the beginning of your love in everyday life.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Therefore, in this article we share our practical experience and the knowledge gained from over 50 decades of couple research with you.<\/p>\n<p style=\"\"><strong>In the following, we will take a closer look at some of the most common relationship myths and explain what is needed \u2013 from a couples therapy perspective \u2013 for a happy relationship, and conversely, what is <em>not<\/em> needed for fulfilling relationships. \ud83d\ude09<\/strong><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">\ud83d\ude80 Already <span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">65,511 people<\/span> have gained clarity through the test.<\/p>\n<h2 style=\"\" id=\"t-1693157637445\"><strong>Relationship myth 1: Arguments are like a cleansing thunderstorm!<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Illustration of a arguing couple, where the man is pointing his finger at his partner.\" data-id=\"52954\" width=\"812\" data-init-width=\"850\" height=\"461\" data-init-height=\"483\" src=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/Wie-Beziehungen-funktionieren-Beziehungsmythos-Streit.webp\" data-width=\"812\" data-height=\"461\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 850 \/ 483;\" title=\"Argument in relationship\" loading=\"lazy\"><\/span><\/p>\n<p><strong>Every argument carries the risk of &#8220;fine cracks&#8221; appearing, which can grow larger with each subsequent argument and ultimately lead to the breakdown of the relationship &#8211; because words spoken in anger often hurt deeply and cannot be easily forgotten.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>If you were given a precious vase as a gift (and isn&#8217;t your partner, your love, your own relationship among the most precious things in your life?), you wouldn&#8217;t just casually hit it in passing, even in a bad mood \u2013 and then sooner or later wonder why the beautiful vase broke, needed to be glued, and would never be undamaged again&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>IMPORTANT! This does NOT mean that happy relationships cannot and should not contain controversies, differing needs, differing opinions, heated discussions, honesty (even if it is uncomfortable for both partners), etc.<\/p>\n<p><strong>BUT:<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>Conflict is not the solution.<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>Conflict should not be considered &#8220;normal&#8221;.<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong><em>There is no such thing as a culture<\/em> of conflict &nbsp;.<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Relationships need other forms of joint conflict resolution, which should be used as early as possible \u2013 namely when couples still have trust in each other and respect for one another \u2013 and not only when anger and resentment are so great that conflict can no longer be avoided.<\/p>\n<h2 style=\"\" id=\"t-1693157637446\"><strong>Relationship myth 2: The partner as a lightning rod<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Illustration of a disappointed, heartbroken couple contemplating separation, with the woman squatting.\" data-id=\"55980\" width=\"812\" data-init-width=\"768\" height=\"461\" data-init-height=\"432\" src=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/03\/Folgen-emotionaler-Abhaengigkeit.jpg\" data-width=\"812\" data-height=\"461\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 768 \/ 432;\" title=\"Consequences of emotional dependency\" loading=\"lazy\"><\/span><\/p>\n<p>&#8220;You have to pull yourself together everywhere \u2013 in a long-term relationship, it&#8217;s simply unavoidable that sooner or later your partner will become a lightning rod&#8230;&#8221;<\/p>\n<p><strong>The convention of not regularly &#8220;letting loose&#8221; in social interactions, striving for respect, and initially &#8220;holding oneself back&#8221; has its good reason<\/strong> :<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>In a work context, one would be dismissed as quickly as possible or no longer &#8220;booked&#8221;.<\/li>\n<li>In a friendship context, one would have had friends for the longest time.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Why shouldn&#8217;t that also apply to couples? Can behaving like a madman towards your partner really have no consequences? It&#8217;s not set in stone that the other person has to love you forever and retain their positive feelings \u2013 no matter how you behave or what you do.<\/p>\n<p><strong>A relationship is precious and needs to be treated with care!<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>It is the responsibility of each individual to consider where and how they can get rid of excess negative energies before turning to their partner.<\/p>\n<p>But how can we \u2013 whether man or woman, older or younger, recently or long together \u2013 learn not to freak out towards our partner, even when we are very upset?<\/p>\n<p>What does it take to control strong emotions like anger and frustration, to remain respectful to one another, not to use the other as a lightning rod \u2013 and to do so over years and decades?<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Perhaps a classic punching bag, relentlessly pounded for a quarter of an hour, might help in between? A sweaty jog in the park? A cold shower?<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>Or a phone call with your best friend, who for years has instantly understood what&#8217;s getting to you: whether it&#8217;s worries about the kids, complaining about your own weaknesses, whether you need to vent about your boss&#8217;s unfairness again, or just generally grumble about being stuck in a terribly exhausting phase with an incredibly annoying daily routine.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>Perhaps it&#8217;s nice to see our most relaxed friend enjoying an after-work beer: the one who doesn&#8217;t need anything explained to him and yet always has a fitting remark. The one who&#8217;s immediately ready to philosophize about life together and chat all night long.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>After that, the partner will certainly no longer receive the whole negative &#8220;packet&#8221; unfiltered.<\/p>\n<p><strong>When dealing with sensitive issues in a relationship, the rule is: only strike when they&#8217;re no longer extremely hot! In other words: cool down instead of stirring things up!<\/strong><\/p>\n<h2 style=\"\" id=\"t-1693157637447\"><strong>Relationship myth 3: Problems must always be discussed.<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Drawing of a couple sitting confused on a sofa, talking uncertainly about their relationship, with speech bubbles\" data-id=\"49072\" width=\"812\" data-init-width=\"850\" height=\"461\" data-init-height=\"483\" src=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/Beziehung-retten-Gespraech.jpg\" data-width=\"812\" data-height=\"461\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 850 \/ 483;\" title=\"Saving a relationship through communication\" loading=\"lazy\"><\/span><\/p>\n<p><strong>Talking a lot doesn&#8217;t automatically lead to solving problems! Often, people keep circling back to the same issues for a very long time \u2013 and as a result, the problems are either cemented or even made disproportionately large instead of being softened and resolved.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Important when a couple talks to each other about their different needs:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Remain open to <em>truly<\/em> new and unconventional solutions, or a good compromise \u2013 otherwise, there&#8217;s a risk that everyone already thinks they know what the best possible solution looks like. Instead of listening attentively to the other person, you&#8217;ll be mentally gathering your own counterarguments (while your partner is speaking).<\/li>\n<li>A compromise is only good if it hurts both sides (a little).<\/li>\n<li>If a &#8216;problem&#8217; arises from a personality trait of one partner (e.g., &#8220;Why are you always so quiet (and not bubbly and extroverted)?!&#8221; or &#8220;Your slowness is driving me crazy! Please, for goodness&#8217; sake, talk a little faster&#8230;&#8221; or similar), the likelihood of resolving this problem together is extremely low. Blaming your partner&#8217;s quirks or weaknesses helps no one and certainly won&#8217;t lead to renewed feelings of closeness or happiness after this harsh confrontation.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong>To all those who want to have a long, happy relationship: Put more energy into accepting your partner&#8217;s quirks or small weaknesses instead of trying to change them by force (because that won&#8217;t work anyway!).&nbsp;<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Most couples report that both partners immediately felt closer to each other again and had the feeling \u2013 sometimes after years! \u2013 that they could finally have open conversations again as soon as it was clarified that they no longer wanted to &#8216;re-educate&#8217; each other, but would instead address the question together in an empathetic way of what might be good for their relationship.<\/p>\n<h2 style=\"\" id=\"t-1693157637448\"><strong>Relationship myth 4: Solve the problems first!<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Sketch of a couple sitting silently opposite each other at a table with a lightning cloud between them\" data-id=\"49131\" width=\"812\" data-init-width=\"850\" height=\"457\" data-init-height=\"478\" src=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/Soll-ich-mich-trennen-Klarheit-Entscheidung.jpg\" data-width=\"812\" data-height=\"457\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 850 \/ 478;\" title=\"Decision to end relationship\" loading=\"lazy\"><\/span><\/p>\n<p><em>&#8220;First<\/em> &nbsp;we have to solve our problems \u2013&nbsp; <em>then<\/em> &nbsp;we can (maybe) have a better time together again \u2013 and one day have what is understood as a <em>happy relationship<\/em> .&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>A very common misconception! Because it&#8217;s exactly the opposite:<\/p>\n<p><strong>Only when the atmosphere in the relationship is (again) somewhat relaxed and both partners can experience untroubled togetherness, is each partner willing to listen to what could make the other happy and satisfied &#8211; and does not automatically tune out when the partner expresses concrete wishes for change.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Then there is also no risk that both partners in the relationship will defend themselves and come up with their own points of criticism as soon as they feel criticized themselves.<\/p>\n<p><strong>The archaic mechanism of flight or defense is at work in all kinds of relationships:<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Anyone who feels cornered by their partner will either flee or strike back. And that&#8217;s exactly what a sentence like &#8220;We need to talk!&#8221; immediately triggers.<\/p>\n<h2 style=\"\" id=\"t-1693157637449\"><strong>Relationship myth 5: The past must be dealt with!<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Sketch of a couple sitting separately, reflecting on conflicts in their relationship, with a thought bubble.\" data-id=\"49157\" width=\"812\" data-init-width=\"850\" height=\"461\" data-init-height=\"483\" src=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/Wie-Beziehungen-funktionieren-Vergangenes-muss-aufgearbeitet-werden.jpg\" data-width=\"812\" data-height=\"461\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 850 \/ 483;\" title=\"Relationship conflicts\" loading=\"lazy\"><\/span><\/p>\n<p><strong>Life happens <em>every day<\/em> !<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Those who constantly cling to the past and continually focus their attention on negative past experiences in the relationship lose sight of the present and fail to create positive opportunities day after day.<\/p>\n<p><strong>But positive experiences are the stuff that every happy relationship is made of: They need to counterbalance unpleasant experiences from the past.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>In most cases, the far better strategy is to repeatedly strive to let unpleasant situations that lie in the past and can no longer be changed remain in the past, to sort them into a kind of imaginary &#8220;past box&#8221; and actively close them.<\/p>\n<h2 style=\"\" id=\"t-1693157637450\"><strong>Relationship myth 6: My criticism is only well-intentioned!<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Sketch of a woman criticizing her overweight partner on the scales with a dumbbell and tennis racket.\" data-id=\"49158\" width=\"812\" data-init-width=\"850\" height=\"461\" data-init-height=\"483\" src=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/Wie-Beziehungen-funktionieren-Kritik.jpg\" data-width=\"812\" data-height=\"461\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 850 \/ 483;\" title=\"Criticizing your partner\" loading=\"lazy\"><\/span><\/p>\n<p>I only mean well when I occasionally remind my husband\/wife that he\/she should lose weight\/stop smoking\/do more exercise\/dress differently\/present themselves better (&#8230;).<\/p>\n<p>First of all, you can of course wish for ANYTHING:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>That your partner, who has become chubby, loses 15 kilos and will be standing in front of you with a six-pack in a few weeks.<\/li>\n<li>That the unathletic partner goes to the gym 3 times a week so that a joint mountain tour can finally work out.<\/li>\n<li>That the partner, exhausted over the weekend, goes out on the town with someone on Saturday Night until dawn \u2013 and what else\u2026<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>BUT: It is nowhere written that all our wishes must be fulfilled. And certainly not when they primarily concern the transformation of another person.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Everyone must complete their own personal development \u2013 \u200b\u200bat their own pace, ideally without too much external pressure, trusting that they will be liked as a &#8220;complete package&#8221; \u2013 including their own weaknesses.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Otherwise, so-called &#8220;reactance&#8221; is created, i.e., even if the partner knows that our suggestions\/wishes are generally good, important and correct (losing weight, quitting smoking, drinking less alcohol, doing more exercise, becoming more sociable, etc.):<\/p>\n<p>If he is repeatedly confronted by US with these requests for change in the relationship (with labels like: &#8220;I&#8217;m just worried,&#8221; &#8220;I just want honesty between us!&#8221;), the likelihood increases rapidly that he will not change in the direction we hope for &#8211; because he experiences our requests and reminders (even if they were intended by us as support) as pressure and not (anymore) as primarily his own concern.<\/p>\n<p>All those who make their subjectively perceived relationship quality (&#8220;we have an overall happy relationship&#8221; versus &#8220;things aren&#8217;t going well in our relationship&#8221;) dependent on whether or at what pace the partner&#8217;s supposed weaknesses change, will most likely never be able to enjoy their relationship unclouded.<\/p>\n<h2 style=\"\" id=\"t-1693157637451\"><strong>Relationship myth 7: Control is better than trust.<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Illustration of a man searching for evidence of his wife's affair and infidelity.\" data-id=\"52932\" width=\"812\" data-init-width=\"850\" height=\"461\" data-init-height=\"483\" src=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/Phasen-einer-Affaere-Phase-5.webp\" data-width=\"812\" data-height=\"461\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 850 \/ 483;\" title=\"Keeping affairs and infidelity secret\" loading=\"lazy\"><\/span><\/p>\n<p>If we spy on our loved one (checking their phone, eavesdropping on phone calls, secretly reading emails, subtly questioning their friends, etc.) and they somehow find out, a potentially deep rift in the relationship can quickly develop, because:<\/p>\n<p><strong>Love is a child of freedom.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>We all wish that the other person is &#8220;voluntarily&#8221; and happily loyal to us and of their own volition, and therefore does nothing that could seriously endanger the relationship.<\/p>\n<p>If our partner feels monitored and perceives our default setting as &#8220;distrust and suspicion&#8221; instead of &#8221; <a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/vertrauen\/\">trust<\/a> and, in case of doubt, for the accused,&#8221; then exactly what we wanted to avoid happens in our relationship:<\/p>\n<p><strong>The other person is annoyed. Feels misunderstood. Becomes emotionally distant from us.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Eventually, he will seek recognition elsewhere. And perhaps \u2013 if he is already constantly suspected of infidelity \u2013 he will embark on an affair ( <a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/affaere-verzeihen\/\" style=\"outline: none;\">see also the article &#8220;Forgiving infidelity&#8221;<\/a> ).<\/p>\n<p>Therefore, when we&nbsp; are plagued <a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/eifersucht-bekaempfen\/\" style=\"outline: none;\">by jealousy and fear of loss<\/a> &nbsp;, it is a misguided belief to think:<\/p>\n<p>In this relationship, we simply need to make the enclosure nice and small and easy to navigate, and secure the exit well \u2013 then we will have lifelong control over the creature we love and it will never be lost to us!<\/p>\n<p>That might work with a guinea pig. But with our partner? Never ever!<\/p>\n<p>The tighter we draw the fence around the person we love, the more likely it becomes that they will one day break free from the relationship. Completely. And then forever. Because they have been deprived of space to move around and the air to breathe.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Holding on to what we love at all costs \u2013 that doesn&#8217;t work in a relationship.<\/strong><\/p>\n<h2 style=\"\" id=\"t-1693157637452\"><strong>Relationship myth 8: It&#8217;s better to be sparing with compliments and praise.<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Man with hearts in a thought bubble kneels before woman, showing her affection in the relationship.\" data-id=\"49019\" width=\"812\" data-init-width=\"850\" height=\"461\" data-init-height=\"483\" src=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/Toxische-Beziehung-Love-Bombing.jpg\" data-width=\"812\" data-height=\"461\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 850 \/ 483;\" title=\"Love bombing in a toxic relationship\" loading=\"lazy\"><\/span><\/p>\n<p>&#8220;One should be sparing with compliments and praise \u2013 otherwise the other person will become desensitized.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Everyone benefits from recognition and appreciation. And everyone is happy when they hear and feel that the other person sees, appreciates, and puts into words their own efforts and good qualities.<\/p>\n<p><strong>So, there is no reason NOT to be generous with compliments and praise.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Aside from the fact that it does us good and lifts our mood when we focus our attention on the positive aspects of the other person instead of waiting for what is NOT perfect about them, the other person is involuntarily and constantly reinforced in maintaining and perhaps even expanding their good qualities\u2026<\/p>\n<p><strong>If appreciation for the other person is lacking, there is a high risk that our partner will gradually cease making efforts<\/strong> (&#8220;She\/He doesn&#8217;t see it anyway&#8230;&#8221;) \u2013 so that the relationship threatens to become increasingly loveless. This increases the risk of seeking validation elsewhere.<\/p>\n<h2 id=\"t-1693157637453\"><strong>Relationship myth 9: My partner needs to sense what I need.<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Sketch of a man and woman standing angrily with their backs to each other and keeping their distance.\" data-id=\"57375\" width=\"812\" data-init-width=\"768\" height=\"461\" data-init-height=\"436\" src=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/05\/Fremdgehen-Beziehung-Kommunikation.jpg\" data-width=\"812\" data-height=\"461\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 768 \/ 436;\" title=\"Infidelity, relationship, communication\" loading=\"lazy\"><\/span><\/p>\n<p>What an amazingly persistent misconception!<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;The other person should know me well enough to instinctively sense what I want, what makes me happy, what I need in any given situation \u2013 especially since I already told him so explicitly 23 years ago. After all, he claims to love me. If I have to give him a subtle hint, I can&#8217;t truly appreciate anything my partner does. Other couples understand each other perfectly well without words.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>However, when two individuals come together in a relationship, they each already carry their own specific baggage in their respective &#8220;biographical&#8221; backpacks.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Experiences from one&#8217;s own childhood,<\/li>\n<li>Memories of the parents&#8217; relationship,<\/li>\n<li>various personal relationship experiences<\/li>\n<li>Assumptions about how much of what is needed for a happy relationship (sex, trust, being together, brutal honesty, shared events, meeting other couples, etc.)<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong>As a result, there are often very different ideas about how to show someone you like them.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Example:&nbsp; <strong>Declarations of love<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>the one: in words<\/li>\n<li>the other: through gifts<\/li>\n<li>Yet another: by taking work off the other person&#8217;s hands.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Example:&nbsp; <strong>One of them is troubled<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>One person: to take their partner in their arms and comfort them.<\/li>\n<li>The other: consciously leaving the partner alone<\/li>\n<li>A third option: Trying to distract the partner<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Example:&nbsp; <strong>Support during stress<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>One: Asking questions and listening.<\/li>\n<li>The other: to come up with concrete solutions.<\/li>\n<li>A third option: offer relaxation opportunities for in-between moments<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Even if a couple supposedly knows each other very well:<\/p>\n<p><strong>It is always astonishing to see in which areas significant differences still exist between partners even after many years of relationship, and how surprised both are when these differences are finally explicitly addressed<\/strong> .<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Yes, that&#8217;s actually true&#8230; now that you mention it&#8230; I&#8217;ve never thought of it that way before, that it&#8217;s really also a kind of declaration of love that you&#8217;ve been fishing my long hair out of the drain every day for years without complaint, because I never do that myself&#8230; ahem&#8230;&#8221; or:<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Okay. From now on, I won&#8217;t try to pressure you to regularly TELL me you love me, but I&#8217;ll try to see other signs (like hugging me or entertaining the kids early on weekend mornings so I can sleep in) as expressions of love&#8230; I&#8217;m just not used to that from before. In my family, everyone always TOLD each other how they felt. That&#8217;s why I was always waiting to HEAR more from you&#8230;&#8221;<\/p>\n<h2 style=\"\" id=\"t-1693157637454\"><strong>Relationship myth 10: Why always me?<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Sketch of a woman holding a bag of anger and rage, thinking about the argument with her partner\" data-id=\"49122\" width=\"812\" data-init-width=\"850\" height=\"461\" data-init-height=\"483\" src=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/Staendiger-Streit-in-der-Beziehung-Streiten-alleine-geht-nicht.png\" data-width=\"812\" data-height=\"461\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 850 \/ 483;\" title=\"Constant arguments in the relationship\" loading=\"lazy\"><\/span><\/p>\n<p>&#8220;If I always have to make the first effort, the relationship can&#8217;t be good.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>YOU are the only person you can change. So why wait for the other person to make the first move and get annoyed in the meantime? Why not repeatedly model the way you want to be treated?<\/p>\n<p><strong>The \u2013 often defiant \u2013 attitude: \u201cWhy me again? It\u2019s the other person\u2019s turn now!\u201d is frequently the reason why an unfavorable status quo persists unnecessarily long (sometimes for years) and both remain in a bad atmosphere.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>However, if ONE of them starts to (again) take the initiative and approaches the other in a benevolent and loving manner, the other will most likely follow suit a short time later.<\/p>\n<p>This is the principle of so-called &#8220;reciprocity.&#8221; And surprisingly, it works even when the partnership has been plagued by problems for a long time\u2026<\/p>\n<p>The only important condition, however, is that you must consistently and consistently switch to &#8220;positive interaction&#8221; for &#8211; ideally &#8211; SEVERAL days in a row &#8211; and not be friendly and loving for a few hours, then complain or snipe in between, then be a little nice again and then badmouth the other person again&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>Otherwise, the partner \u2013 quite rightly \u2013 does not truly believe that a lasting and genuinely positive development has begun, but remains suspicious, stays &#8220;on guard&#8221; and does not enter the new positive spiral himself.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Erich Fromm summed up this principle in the following words: The richer person can give more.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>In other words: Whenever you are the &#8220;richer&#8221; one (i.e., you realized more quickly that something needed to be changed, etc.) -&gt; you should give! (i.e., do something without waiting too long&#8230;)<\/p>\n<h2 style=\"\" id=\"t-1698411056061\"><strong>Relationship myth 11: Affection is either there \u2013 or it isn&#8217;t.<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Illustration of a couple sitting apart and sadly on the couch, thinking.\" data-id=\"52977\" width=\"812\" data-init-width=\"850\" height=\"461\" data-init-height=\"483\" src=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/Trennung-auf-Zeit-gemeinsame-Absprachen.webp\" data-width=\"812\" data-height=\"461\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 850 \/ 483;\" title=\"When a temporary separation makes sense\" loading=\"lazy\"><\/span><\/p>\n<p>A common misconception among many couples is that once love is gone, it&#8217;s lost forever. There&#8217;s really nothing you can do about it.<\/p>\n<p>HALT!<\/p>\n<p><strong>If one consciously and deliberately strives to create a loving atmosphere and a supportive approach, the seemingly lost affection can very well return<\/strong> ( <a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/?p=7584\" style=\"outline: none;\">see also the article &#8220;Overcoming a Relationship Crisis&#8221;<\/a> ).<\/p>\n<p>Humans are creatures of attachment \u2013 \u200b\u200bthat is, shared history makes people feel bound to their partners.<\/p>\n<p><strong>And once a bond has formed, it doesn&#8217;t disappear completely so easily. Shared experiences forge a strong connection<\/strong> \u2013 and the accompanying feeling of belonging and affection can usually be rekindled by most couples if they manage to approach each other with more friendliness and interest, listen to one another, consciously remember challenges overcome together, and\/or make an effort to create beautiful shared experiences in the here and now.<\/p>\n<h2 style=\"\" id=\"t-1693058012268\"><strong>Test: Wie gut funktioniert Ihre Beziehung wirklich?<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p>Mehr zum Thema Wir-Gef\u00fchl, Positiva und Herausforderungen in Ihrer Beziehung erfahren Sie in unserem wissenschaftlich entwickelten Partnerschaftstest (kostenfrei), der bereits von vielen tausend Paaren genutzt wurde.<\/p>\n<p>Falls Sie den Test noch nicht gemacht haben sollten und wir noch kein (gratis) Beziehungsprofil f\u00fcr Sie erstellen konnten:<\/p>\n<p>Gewinnen Sie jetzt Klarheit dar\u00fcber, wie gut Ihre Beziehung tats\u00e4chlich &#8220;funktioniert&#8221;.<\/p>\n<p>Treten Sie einen Schritt zur\u00fcck und analysieren Sie Ihre Liebe aus der Vogelperspektive.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Sobald Sie einen konkreten \u00dcberblick dar\u00fcber haben, wie Sie Ihre Partnerschaft&nbsp;<em>erleben<\/em>&nbsp;und wie Sie sie selbst&nbsp;<em>gestalten<\/em>, werden Sie einen viel sch\u00e4rferen Blick auf Ihre gemeinsamen Ressourcen und Herausforderungen gewinnen.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Es wird Sie etwa 10 Minuten Zeit kosten, die Fragen auszuf\u00fcllen.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">Machen Sie jetzt Ihren Beziehungstest! (kostenfrei)<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>Wie steht es um Ihre Beziehung?<br \/>Was sind Ihre St\u00e4rken &amp; Schw\u00e4chen?<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><span><img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Image of the personal relationship profile from the PaarBalance relationship test\" data-id=\"53041\" data-init-width=\"1000\" data-init-height=\"1000\" src=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/09\/beziehungsprofil.webp\" data-width=\"212\" data-height=\"212\" width=\"212\" height=\"212\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 1000 \/ 1000;\" title=\"Relationship profile Relationship test\" loading=\"lazy\"><\/span><\/p>\n<p>Das erfahren Sie sofort im Anschluss in Ihrem pers\u00f6nlichen PaarBalance-Beziehungsprofil (gratis).<\/p>\n<p><strong>Starten Sie jetzt mit dem Beziehungstest!<\/strong><\/p>\n<p style=\"\">\u2713 Wissenschaftlich fundiert<br \/>\u2713 Inklusive detaillierter Auswertung<br \/>\u2713 Keine Weitergabe Ihrer Daten<br \/>\u2713 100% gratis &amp; unverbindlich<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">100% sicher. Wir halten uns an den Datenschutz. &nbsp;Die Anmeldung f\u00fcr den Beziehungstest ist <span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">kostenlos<\/span>.<br \/>Bitte lesen Sie zuvor diese wichtigen Informationen:<br \/><a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/datenschutzerklaerung\/\" target=\"_blank\" style=\"outline: none;\">Datenschutz<\/a>&nbsp;\u1427 <a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/agb\/\" target=\"_blank\" style=\"outline: none;\">AGB<\/a>&nbsp;\u1427 <a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/allgemeine-informationsvertragsbedingungen\/\" target=\"_blank\" style=\"outline: none;\">Allgemeine Informationsvertragsbedingungen<\/a>&nbsp;. <a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/04\/Transparenzerklaerung.pdf\" target=\"_blank\" style=\"outline: none;\">Transparenzerkl\u00e4rung<\/a><\/p>\n<p>Alles Gute f\u00fcr Sie und Ihre Beziehung!<\/p>\n<p>Ihre <a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/dr-judith-gastner\/\" style=\"outline: none;\">Dr. Judith Gastner<\/a><\/p>\n<p style=\"\"><strong>Passende Artikel zum Thema &#8220;Wie Beziehungen funktionieren&#8221;<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/beziehungstest\/\" dynamic-postlink=\"tcb_post_the_permalink\" data-shortcode-id=\"50568\"><\/a><\/p>\n<h4 id=\"t-1732202011743\" style=\"\"><span data-shortcode=\"tcb_post_title\" data-shortcode-name=\"Post title\" data-extra_key=\"\" data-attr-link=\"1\" data-attr-target=\"0\" data-attr-rel=\"0\" data-option-inline=\"1\" data-attr-static-link=\"{&quot;className&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/beziehungstest\/&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;Relationship test (free \u2013 10 min.): How is my relationship doing?&quot;,&quot;class&quot;:&quot;&quot;}\" data-attr-css=\"\" style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/beziehungstest\/\" title=\"Relationship test (free \u2013 10 min.): How is my relationship doing?\" data-css=\"\">Relationship test (free \u2013 10 min.): How is my relationship doing?<\/a><\/span><\/h4>\n<p>Want to learn more about the strengths and weaknesses of your relationship? With PaarBalance&#8217;s scientifically based online relationship test, you&#8217;ll instantly receive your personal relationship profile. 10 minutes well spent.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/beziehungstest\/#more-65904\"><\/a><a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/toxische-beziehung\/\" dynamic-postlink=\"tcb_post_the_permalink\" data-shortcode-id=\"50568\"><\/a><\/p>\n<h4 id=\"t-1732202011743\" style=\"\"><span data-shortcode=\"tcb_post_title\" data-shortcode-name=\"Post title\" data-extra_key=\"\" data-attr-link=\"1\" data-attr-target=\"0\" data-attr-rel=\"0\" data-option-inline=\"1\" data-attr-static-link=\"{&quot;className&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/beziehungstest\/&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;Relationship test (free \u2013 10 min.): How is my relationship doing?&quot;,&quot;class&quot;:&quot;&quot;}\" data-attr-css=\"\" style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/toxische-beziehung\/\" title=\"Toxic relationship \u2013 How to recognize it and what to do?\" data-css=\"\">Toxic relationship \u2013 How to recognize it and what to do?<\/a><\/span><\/h4>\n<p>Recognizing and avoiding toxic relationships. \u2013 Is separation the only way out of a toxic relationship? Or can you work through it together? Here you&#8217;ll find everything you need to know about toxic relationships and ways out of the crisis.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/toxische-beziehung\/#more-65955\"><\/a><a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/5-sprachen-der-liebe\/\" dynamic-postlink=\"tcb_post_the_permalink\" data-shortcode-id=\"50568\"><\/a><\/p>\n<h4 id=\"t-1732202011743\" style=\"\"><span data-shortcode=\"tcb_post_title\" data-shortcode-name=\"Post title\" data-extra_key=\"\" data-attr-link=\"1\" data-attr-target=\"0\" data-attr-rel=\"0\" data-option-inline=\"1\" data-attr-static-link=\"{&quot;className&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/beziehungstest\/&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;Relationship test (free \u2013 10 min.): How is my relationship doing?&quot;,&quot;class&quot;:&quot;&quot;}\" data-attr-css=\"\" style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/5-sprachen-der-liebe\/\" title=\"The 5 Love Languages \u2013 take the test!\" data-css=\"\">The 5 Love Languages \u2013 take the test!<\/a><\/span><\/h4>\n<p>Each of us expresses love in our own way. Why it&#8217;s so important in a relationship to know your own &#8218;love language&#8216; and that of your partner, and when it&#8217;s highly recommended to learn a &#8218;foreign language&#8216; \u2013 you&#8217;ll find out here. Includes a self-test.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/5-sprachen-der-liebe\/#more-65961\"><\/a><\/p>\n<h2 id=\"t-1690967237765\">Frequently Asked Questions<\/h2>\n<h3 style=\"\" id=\"t-1685450315605\"><strong><strong><strong><strong>How do I find the right partner?<\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/h3>\n<p style=\"\">What constitutes a fulfilling relationship for you: shared interests, a similar sense of humor, tenderness and sex, the same values, a sense of family, or a thirst for adventure? Those who know themselves and understand where they could readily accept personal differences and where they probably couldn&#8217;t have a good chance of finding the &#8216;right&#8217; partner&#8230; and keeping them.<\/p>\n<h3 style=\"\" id=\"t-1698411056062\"><strong><strong><strong><strong><strong>How important is communication in a relationship?<\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/h3>\n<p style=\"\">Communication is a fundamental building block of happy relationships. Open exchange and the desire to get to know and understand each other better form the basis for establishing a deep connection and overcoming challenges together. In addition to verbal communication, nonverbal communication also plays a significant role.<\/p>\n<h3 style=\"\" id=\"t-1698411056063\"><strong><strong><strong><strong><strong><strong>What does it take to overcome relationship conflicts?<\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/h3>\n<p style=\"\">The key usually lies in approaching areas of conflict with an open mind: What does each person want? Could the solution lie in a &#8220;both-and&#8221; rather than an &#8220;either-or&#8221;? Is this about principle or about a constructive compromise? If a couple treats each other with respect, then successfully resolved conflicts contribute to strengthening their relationship.<\/p>\n<h3 style=\"\" id=\"t-1698411056064\"><strong><strong><strong><strong><strong><strong><strong>What are the secrets to a happy relationship?<\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/h3>\n<p style=\"\">Unfortunately, there&#8217;s no magic formula for relationship happiness. However, research on couples has identified variables that form the basis for partnership satisfaction. These include: respect and openness; the ability to take responsibility for one&#8217;s own happiness, to apologize, forgive, and let go; a willingness to compromise; and goodwill.<\/p>\n<h3 style=\"\" id=\"t-1698411056065\"><strong><strong><strong><strong><strong><strong><strong><strong>What harms a relationship?<\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/h3>\n<p style=\"\">Lack of honesty, frequent arguments, or a loveless tone can severely damage a relationship in the long run. However, if both partners are genuinely interested in improving their relationship, even a partnership perceived as unhappy can quickly change for the better. Often, only a few adjustments are needed.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>As couple therapists, we are confronted daily with the fact that many people are quite wrong in several of their assumptions about what constitutes a happy partnership and a fulfilling relationship &#8211; sometimes with fatal consequences.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":67969,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":"","tve_updated_post":"<div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv-columns tcb-tablet-hidden\" style=\"--tcb-col-el-width: 532;\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea785\" data-class=\"tcb-tablet-hidden\"><div class=\"tcb-flex-row v-2 m-edit tcb-medium-no-wrap tcb--cols--2 tcb-mobile-wrap\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea784\" style=\"\"><div class=\"tcb-flex-col\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea780\" style=\"\"><div class=\"tcb-col\" style=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea778\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_contentbox_shortcode thrv-content-box tve-elem-default-pad\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea779\" style=\"\">\n<div class=\"tve-content-box-background\" style=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea781\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"tve-cb\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve_image_caption tcb-post-author-picture tcb-dynamic-field-source\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea771\" data-type=\"\" style=\"\" data-tcb-events=\"\">\n<span class=\"tve_image_frame\" data-tcb-events=\"\">\n[tcb_dynamic_field type=\"author\" alt=\"Standard Blog-Post\" title=\"Standard Blog-Post\" loading=\"lazy\" data-classes=\"avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo avatar avatar-256 photo tve_image\" data-css=\"tve-u-1896f9468f0\"]\n<\/span>\n<\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea776\" style=\"\"><div class=\"tcb-plain-text\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea77c\" style=\"text-align: left;\"><span class=\"thrive-shortcode-content\" data-shortcode=\"tcb_post_author_name\" data-shortcode-name=\"Author name\" data-extra_key=\"\" data-attr-link=\"1\" data-attr-target=\"0\" data-attr-rel=\"0\" data-option-inline=\"1\" data-attr-static-link=\"{&quot;className&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/author\/jgastner\/&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;Dr. Judith Gastner&quot;,&quot;data-css&quot;:&quot;tve-u-192dfbea77e&quot;,&quot;class&quot;:&quot;&quot;}\" data-attr-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea77e\" style=\"text-decoration: none;\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea77d\">[tcb_post_author_name link='1' target='0' rel='0' inline='1' 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0-36.204l36.203-36.204c9.997-9.998 26.207-9.998 36.204 0L192 312.69 432.095 72.596c9.997-9.997 26.207-9.997 36.204 0l36.203 36.204c9.997 9.997 9.997 26.206 0 36.204l-294.4 294.401c-9.998 9.997-26.207 9.997-36.204-.001z\"><\/path><\/svg><\/div><\/div>\n<\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><div class=\"tcb-flex-col\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeac\" style=\"\"><div class=\"tcb-col\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeb1\" style=\"\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebec1\" style=\"\"><div class=\"tcb-plain-text\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebec7\" style=\"text-align: left;\"><strong><span data-css=\"tve-u-192df4855f7\" style=\"\">Quality assurance<\/span><\/strong><\/div><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeae\" style=\"\"><div class=\"tcb-plain-text\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebea6\" style=\"text-align: left;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/prof-dr-ludwig-schindler\/\" class=\"\" style=\"outline: none;\"><span data-css=\"tve-u-189b8212a78\">Prof. Dr. Dr. Ludwig Schindler<\/span><\/a><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><div class=\"tcb-flex-col\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeb6\" style=\"\"><div class=\"tcb-col\" style=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeb2\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_contentbox_shortcode thrv-content-box tve-elem-default-pad\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeb7\" style=\"\">\n<div class=\"tve-content-box-background\" style=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeb5\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"tve-cb\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv-divider tcb-desktop-hidden tcb-tablet-hidden\" data-style-d=\"tve_sep-1\" data-thickness-d=\"3\" data-color-d=\"rgb(66, 66, 66)\" data-gradient-d=\"linear-gradient(90deg, rgb(66, 66, 66) 0%, rgb(0, 0, 0) 100%)\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebece\" data-thickness-m=\"2\" data-color-m=\"rgb(255, 255, 255)\" style=\"\">\n\t<hr class=\"tve_sep tve_sep-1\" style=\"\">\n<\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebecb\" style=\"\"><div class=\"tcb-plain-text\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeb4\" style=\"text-align: left;\"><span data-css=\"tve-u-191bd379194\" style=\"\">Share this article \ud83d\udc47\ud83c\udffb<\/span><\/div><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv-columns\" style=\"--tcb-col-el-width: 119.25; max-width: 50%; --tve-applied-max-width: 50% !important;\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebebf\"><div class=\"tcb-flex-row v-2 tcb--cols--5 tcb-resized tcb-mobile-no-wrap m-edit\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebec0\" style=\"\"><div class=\"tcb-flex-col\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeb9\" style=\"\"><div class=\"tcb-col\"><div class=\"tcb-clear\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeba\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wa.me\/?text=https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wie-beziehungen-funktionieren\/\" target=\"_blank\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_icon tcb-icon-display tcb-local-vars-root\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeb8\" style=\"\" data-tcb_hover_state_parent=\"\" data-link-wrap=\"true\"><svg 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3.2-26.4-1.3-2.5-5-3.9-10.5-6.6z\"><\/path><\/svg><\/div><\/a><\/div><\/div><\/div><div class=\"tcb-flex-col\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebebb\" style=\"\"><div class=\"tcb-col\"><div class=\"tcb-clear\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeba\"><a href=\"mailto:?subject=Wie Beziehungen funktionieren&amp;body=Ich habe diesen interessanten Artikel gefunden: https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wie-beziehungen-funktionieren\/\" target=\"_blank\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_icon tcb-icon-display tcb-local-vars-root\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebec6\" style=\"\" data-tcb_hover_state_parent=\"\" data-link-wrap=\"true\"><svg class=\"tcb-icon tcb-local-vars-root\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" data-id=\"icon-email-send-solid\" data-name=\"\" style=\"\"><path d=\"M13 17H17V14L22 18.5L17 23V20H13V17M20 4H4A2 2 0 0 0 2 6V18A2 2 0 0 0 4 20H11.35A5.8 5.8 0 0 1 11 18A6 6 0 0 1 22 14.69V6A2 2 0 0 0 20 4M20 8L12 13L4 8V6L12 11L20 6Z\"><\/path><\/svg><\/div><\/a><\/div><\/div><\/div><div class=\"tcb-flex-col\" 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13.41,9.17Z\"><\/path><\/svg><\/div><\/a><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div>\n<\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_custom_html_shortcode\" data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebec9\" style=\"\"><code class=\"tve_js_placeholder\">[tcb-script]\ndocument.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\", function() {\n    const copyLinks = document.querySelectorAll(\".copy-link\");\n    copyLinks.forEach(link =&gt; {\n        link.addEventListener(\"click\", function(event) {\n            event.preventDefault();\n            const textToCopy = \"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wie-beziehungen-funktionieren\/\";\n            navigator.clipboard.writeText(textToCopy).then(function() {\n                alert(\"Link wurde in die Zwischenablage kopiert!\");\n            }).catch(function(error) {\n                alert(\"Fehler beim Kopieren des Links: \" + error);\n            });\n        });\n    });\n});\n[\/tcb-script]<\/code><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve_image_caption tve-image-caption-below\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d3034c53\" style=\"--tve-border-radius: 5px; border-radius: 5px; overflow: hidden; width: 100%;\"><span class=\"tve_image_frame\"><picture decoding=\"async\" class=\"tve_image tcb-moved-image wp-image-59333\" data-id=\"59333\" data-init-width=\"800\" data-init-height=\"260\" title=\"Article Header - How Relationships Work\" data-width=\"755\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 800 \/ 260;\" data-css=\"tve-u-1924b043e05\" data-height=\"245\" loading=\"lazy\">\n<source type=\"image\/webp\">\n<img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Drawing of a couple lovingly gazing at each other while standing separately on two mountains.\" data-id=\"59333\" data-init-width=\"800\" data-init-height=\"260\" src=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/09\/Artikel-Header-Wie-Beziehungen-funktionieren.jpg\" data-width=\"734\" data-css=\"tve-u-18b7130a0ef\" data-height=\"238\" width=\"734\" height=\"238\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 800 \/ 260;\" class=\"wp-image-59333\" title=\"How does a relationship work properly?\" loading=\"lazy\">\n<\/picture>\n<\/span><p class=\"thrv_wrapper wp-caption-text thrv-inline-text\" style=\"text-align: center;\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d3034c54\"><em><em>A happy relationship is demonstrably the most important factor for health and life satisfaction - all the more surprising is that very few couples (either individually or together) take a closer look at how a happy relationship actually works.<\/em><\/em><\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve_image_caption\" data-css=\"tve-u-192b08024cc\" style=\"\"><span class=\"tve_image_frame\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"tve_image wp-image-59982\" alt=\"\" data-id=\"59982\" width=\"30\" data-init-width=\"150\" height=\"30\" data-init-height=\"150\" title=\"PaarBalance Divider Icon\" src=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/09\/PaarBalance-Divider-Icon.png\" data-width=\"30\" data-height=\"30\" data-css=\"tve-u-1920f68b05b\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 150 \/ 150;\" loading=\"lazy\"><\/span><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_contentbox_shortcode thrv-content-box tve-elem-default-pad\" data-css=\"tve-u-191fe46e844\" style=\"\">\n\t<div class=\"tve-content-box-background\" style=\"--tve-border-width: 0px; border: none !important;\" data-css=\"tve-u-191fe46e843\"><\/div>\n\t<div class=\"tve-cb\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\">\t<p style=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-191fe46e845\"><strong>\u261d\ud83c\udffb Quick Start: How Relationships Work&nbsp;<\/strong><\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv-styled_list tcb-icon-display\" data-icon-code=\"icon-angle-right-solid\" data-css=\"tve-u-191fe46e846\" style=\"\"><ul class=\"tcb-styled-list\"><li class=\"thrv-styled-list-item\" data-css=\"tve-u-191fe46e847\" style=\"\"><div class=\"tcb-styled-list-icon\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_icon tve_no_drag tcb-no-delete tcb-no-clone tcb-no-save tcb-icon-inherit-style tcb-local-vars-root\" data-css=\"tve-u-191fe46e84e\" style=\"\"><svg class=\"tcb-icon tcb-local-vars-root\" viewBox=\"0 0 256 512\" data-id=\"icon-angle-right-solid\" data-name=\"\"><path d=\"M224.3 273l-136 136c-9.4 9.4-24.6 9.4-33.9 0l-22.6-22.6c-9.4-9.4-9.4-24.6 0-33.9l96.4-96.4-96.4-96.4c-9.4-9.4-9.4-24.6 0-33.9L54.3 103c9.4-9.4 24.6-9.4 33.9 0l136 136c9.5 9.4 9.5 24.6.1 34z\"><\/path><\/svg><\/div><\/div><span class=\"thrv-advanced-inline-text tve_editable tcb-styled-list-icon-text tcb-no-delete tcb-no-save\" data-css=\"tve-u-191fe46e848\" style=\"\"><strong>Arguments \u2013 a cleansing storm or a relationship killer?&nbsp;<\/strong> Frequent arguments usually leave more wounds than they heal. Learn how to effectively address conflicts without further straining your relationship. <a href=\"#tve-jump-191fe4dcf5d\" class=\"tve-jump-scroll\">Find out more here. \u2193<\/a><br><\/span><\/li><li class=\"thrv-styled-list-item\" data-css=\"tve-u-191fe46e847\"><div class=\"tcb-styled-list-icon\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_icon tve_no_drag tcb-no-delete tcb-no-clone tcb-no-save tcb-icon-inherit-style\" data-css=\"tve-u-191fe4bc0f6\"><svg class=\"tcb-icon tcb-local-vars-root\" viewBox=\"0 0 256 512\" data-id=\"icon-angle-right-solid\" data-name=\"\"><path d=\"M224.3 273l-136 136c-9.4 9.4-24.6 9.4-33.9 0l-22.6-22.6c-9.4-9.4-9.4-24.6 0-33.9l96.4-96.4-96.4-96.4c-9.4-9.4-9.4-24.6 0-33.9L54.3 103c9.4-9.4 24.6-9.4 33.9 0l136 136c9.5 9.4 9.5 24.6.1 34z\"><\/path><\/svg><\/div><\/div><span class=\"thrv-advanced-inline-text tve_editable tcb-styled-list-icon-text tcb-no-delete tcb-no-save\" data-css=\"tve-u-191fe46e848\"><strong>Control and mistrust destroy trust:<\/strong> Trust forms the foundation of every relationship. <a href=\"#tve-jump-191fe4e2d1b\" class=\"tve-jump-scroll\" style=\"outline: none;\">Learn here<\/a> why control is counterproductive and how you can create an open and trusting atmosphere. \u2193<\/span><\/li><li class=\"thrv-styled-list-item\" data-css=\"tve-u-191fe46e847\"><div class=\"tcb-styled-list-icon\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_icon tve_no_drag tcb-no-delete tcb-no-clone tcb-no-save tcb-icon-inherit-style\" data-css=\"tve-u-191fe4c7844\"><svg class=\"tcb-icon tcb-local-vars-root\" viewBox=\"0 0 256 512\" data-id=\"icon-angle-right-solid\" data-name=\"\"><path d=\"M224.3 273l-136 136c-9.4 9.4-24.6 9.4-33.9 0l-22.6-22.6c-9.4-9.4-9.4-24.6 0-33.9l96.4-96.4-96.4-96.4c-9.4-9.4-9.4-24.6 0-33.9L54.3 103c9.4-9.4 24.6-9.4 33.9 0l136 136c9.5 9.4 9.5 24.6.1 34z\"><\/path><\/svg><\/div><\/div><span class=\"thrv-advanced-inline-text tve_editable tcb-styled-list-icon-text tcb-no-delete tcb-no-save\" data-css=\"tve-u-191fe46e848\"><strong>Affection can grow:<\/strong> Love isn't a fixed feeling that either exists or it doesn't. Discover how you can actively nurture affection and deepen your relationship emotionally \u2013 for more affection and togetherness \u2013 <a href=\"#tve-jump-191fe4e73d5\" class=\"tve-jump-scroll\" style=\"outline: none;\">read on here. \u2193<\/a><\/span><\/li><\/ul><\/div><\/div>\n<\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve_image_caption\" data-css=\"tve-u-192b08024cc\" style=\"\"><span class=\"tve_image_frame\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"tve_image wp-image-59982\" alt=\"\" data-id=\"59982\" width=\"30\" data-init-width=\"150\" height=\"30\" data-init-height=\"150\" title=\"PaarBalance Divider Icon\" src=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/09\/PaarBalance-Divider-Icon.png\" data-width=\"30\" data-height=\"30\" data-css=\"tve-u-1920f68b05b\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 150 \/ 150;\" loading=\"lazy\"><\/span><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886cc3cafa\"><p>As couple therapists ( <a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/die-wissenschaft-hinter-paarbalance\/\" class=\"\" style=\"outline: none;\">more about us here<\/a> ) we are confronted daily with the fact that many people are quite wrong in several of their assumptions about what constitutes a happy partnership and a fulfilling relationship - with sometimes fatal consequences.<\/p><p><strong>We want you to become your own relationship expert for your existing partnership and to (re)discover how to revive the good feelings from the beginning of your love in everyday life.<\/strong><\/p><p>Therefore, in this article we share our practical experience and the knowledge gained from over 50 decades of couple research with you.<\/p><p style=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d3638f93\"><strong>In the following, we will take a closer look at some of the most common relationship myths and explain what is needed \u2013 from a couples therapy perspective \u2013 for a happy relationship, and conversely, what is <em>not<\/em> needed for fulfilling relationships. ;-)<\/strong><\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv-page-section tve-height-update tcb-window-width tcb-desktop-hidden tcb-tablet-hidden\" data-tve-scroll=\"{&quot;disabled&quot;:[&quot;desktop&quot;,&quot;tablet&quot;],&quot;top&quot;:0,&quot;mode&quot;:&quot;sticky&quot;,&quot;end&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;stickyPosition&quot;:&quot;bottom&quot;}\" data-css=\"tve-u-19818e2a3c2\">\n\t<div class=\"tve-page-section-out\" style=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-19818e2a3bf\"><\/div>\n\t<div class=\"tve-page-section-in tve_empty_dropzone\" data-css=\"tve-u-19818e2a3be\" style=\"\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv-button thrv-button-v2 tcb-local-vars-root tve_ea_thrive_lightbox\" data-css=\"tve-u-19818e2a3ba\" data-button-size-m=\"s\" style=\"\">\n<div class=\"thrive-colors-palette-config\" style=\"display: none !important\">__CONFIG_colors_palette__{\"active_palette\":0,\"config\":{\"colors\":{\"62516\":{\"name\":\"Main Accent\",\"parent\":-1}},\"gradients\":[]},\"palettes\":[{\"name\":\"Default Palette\",\"value\":{\"colors\":{\"62516\":{\"val\":\"var(--tcb-color-0)\"}},\"gradients\":[]}}]}__CONFIG_colors_palette__<\/div>\n<a href=\"\" class=\"tcb-button-link tcb-plain-text tve_evt_manager_listen tve_et_click\" style=\"\" rel=\"\" data-tcb-events=\"__TCB_EVENT_[{&quot;config&quot;:{&quot;l_anim&quot;:&quot;instant&quot;,&quot;l_id&quot;:&quot;65132&quot;},&quot;a&quot;:&quot;thrive_lightbox&quot;,&quot;t&quot;:&quot;click&quot;}]_TNEVE_BCT__\"><span class=\"tcb-button-icon\">\n\t<div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_icon tve_no_drag tve_no_icons tcb-icon-inherit-style\">\n\t<svg data-name=\"credit-card\" class=\"tcb-icon\" version=\"1.1\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" x=\"0px\" y=\"0px\" viewBox=\"0 0 18 14\" xml:space=\"preserve\" preserveAspectRatio=\"none slice\">\n\t\t<g>\n\t\t\t<path d=\"M17.5,1.9v10.6c0,0.8-0.6,1.4-1.4,1.4h-14c-0.8,0-1.4-0.6-1.4-1.4V1.9c0-0.8,0.6-1.4,1.4-1.4h14 C16.9,0.5,17.5,1.1,17.5,1.9z M1.9,1.9v2h14.5v-2c0-0.1-0.1-0.3-0.3-0.3h-14C2,1.6,1.9,1.7,1.9,1.9z M16.4,12.5V7.2H1.9v5.3 c0,0.1,0.1,0.3,0.3,0.3h14C16.3,12.8,16.4,12.6,16.4,12.5z M3,10.5h2.2v1.1H3V10.5z M6.3,10.5h3.4v1.1H6.3V10.5z\"><\/path>\n\t\t<\/g>\n\t<\/svg>\n\t<\/div>\n<\/span>\n\n<span class=\"tcb-button-texts\"><span class=\"tcb-button-text thrv-inline-text\" style=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-19818e2a3bd\">Analyze your relationship now! <\/span><span class=\"tcb-secondary-text thrv-inline-text\" data-css=\"tve-u-19818e2a3bc\" style=\"\">Free relationship test | 10 minutes<\/span><\/span>\n<\/a>\n<\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-css=\"tve-u-19818e2a3c1\" style=\"\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-19818e2a3c0\" style=\"text-align: center;\">\ud83d\ude80 Already <span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">65,511 people<\/span> have gained clarity through the test.<\/p><\/div><\/div>\n<\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve-toc tve-toc-expandable show-icon tcb-icon-display tcb-local-vars-root tve-toc-edit tcb-compact-2 tcb-compact-edit-mode tve_no_drag tcb-no-delete tcb-no-clone tcb-no-save\" data-columns=\"1\" data-ct=\"toc-60692\" data-transition=\"fade\" data-headers=\"h2\" data-numbering=\"advanced\" data-highlight=\"none\" data-ct-name=\"Table of Contents 11\" data-heading-style=\"{&quot;0&quot;:&quot;tve-u-191d89b5408&quot;,&quot;1&quot;:&quot;tve-u-191d89b5406&quot;,&quot;2&quot;:&quot;tve-u-191d89b53f9&quot;}\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fb\" data-state-default=\"collapsed\" data-bullet-style=\"{&quot;0&quot;:&quot;tve-u-66bb3813415186&quot;,&quot;1&quot;:&quot;tve-u-66bb3813415199&quot;,&quot;2&quot;:&quot;tve-u-66bb38134151a6&quot;}\" data-number-style=\"{&quot;0&quot;:&quot;tve-u-191d89b5403&quot;,&quot;1&quot;:&quot;tve-u-191d89b5404&quot;,&quot;2&quot;:&quot;tve-u-191d89b5405&quot;}\" data-animation=\"slide\" data-state-default-d=\"expanded\" data-columns-d=\"1\" data-state-default-m=\"collapsed\" data-element-name=\"Table of Contents\" data-form-settings=\"__TCB_FORM__{&quot;form_identifier&quot;:&quot;clone-of-typisches-verhalten-nach-fremdgehen-so-entlarven-sie-untreue-partner-form-66bb38&quot;}__TCB_FORM__\" data-number-suffix=\"{&quot;0&quot;:&quot;.&quot;}\" data-styled-scrollbar=\"0\" data-tve-scroll=\"{&quot;disabled&quot;:[&quot;desktop&quot;,&quot;tablet&quot;],&quot;top&quot;:61,&quot;mode&quot;:&quot;sticky&quot;,&quot;end&quot;:&quot;&quot;}\" data-id=\"mos72p8e\"><div class=\"thrive-colors-palette-config\" style=\"display: none !important\">__CONFIG_colors_palette__{\"active_palette\":0,\"config\":{\"colors\":{\"a027f\":{\"name\":\"Main Accent\",\"parent\":-1},\"21e68\":{\"name\":\"Main Accent Light\",\"parent\":\"a027f\",\"lock\":{\"lightness\":1}},\"f1170\":{\"name\":\"Main Accent Transparent\",\"parent\":\"\",\"lock\":{\"lightness\":1}}},\"gradients\":[]},\"palettes\":[{\"name\":\"Default\",\"value\":{\"colors\":{\"a027f\":{\"val\":\"rgba(0, 93, 255, 0.05)\"},\"21e68\":{\"val\":\"rgb(184, 211, 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33.941z\"><\/path><\/symbol><symbol id=\"toc-bullet-1-mos72p8e\" viewBox=\"0 0 320 512\" data-id=\"icon-chevron-right-solid\"><path d=\"M285.476 272.971L91.132 467.314c-9.373 9.373-24.569 9.373-33.941 0l-22.667-22.667c-9.357-9.357-9.375-24.522-.04-33.901L188.505 256 34.484 101.255c-9.335-9.379-9.317-24.544.04-33.901l22.667-22.667c9.373-9.373 24.569-9.373 33.941 0L285.475 239.03c9.373 9.372 9.373 24.568.001 33.941z\"><\/path><\/symbol><symbol id=\"toc-bullet-2-mos72p8e\" viewBox=\"0 0 320 512\" data-id=\"icon-chevron-right-solid\"><path d=\"M285.476 272.971L91.132 467.314c-9.373 9.373-24.569 9.373-33.941 0l-22.667-22.667c-9.357-9.357-9.375-24.522-.04-33.901L188.505 256 34.484 101.255c-9.335-9.379-9.317-24.544.04-33.901l22.667-22.667c9.373-9.373 24.569-9.373 33.941 0L285.475 239.03c9.373 9.372 9.373 24.568.001 33.941z\"><\/path><\/symbol><\/svg><div class=\"tve-toc-divider\" style=\"position: absolute; width: 0; height: 0; overflow: hidden;\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv-divider tve-vert-divider\" data-style=\"tve_sep-1\" data-color-d=\"rgb(217, 217, 217)\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5402\" data-style-d=\"tve_sep-4\" data-thickness-d=\"2\"><hr class=\"tve_sep tve_sep-4\" style=\"\"><\/div><\/div>\n<div class=\"tve-content-box-background\" style=\"--tve-border-width: 0px; border: none !important;\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fc\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve-toc-title reverse show-icon tve-no-dropzone tcb-icon-display\" style=\"border-top-left-radius: 10px !important; border-top-right-radius: 10px !important;\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fd\" data-tcb_hover_state_parent=\"\"><div class=\"tve-content-box-background\" style=\"\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"tve-cb\" style=\"\">\n<div class=\"tve-toc-title-icon\" data-icon-code=\"icon-angle-down-solid\" style=\"\"><svg class=\"tcb-icon\" viewBox=\"0 0 320 512\" data-id=\"icon-angle-down-solid\" data-name=\"\"><path d=\"M143 352.3L7 216.3c-9.4-9.4-9.4-24.6 0-33.9l22.6-22.6c9.4-9.4 24.6-9.4 33.9 0l96.4 96.4 96.4-96.4c9.4-9.4 24.6-9.4 33.9 0l22.6 22.6c9.4 9.4 9.4 24.6 0 33.9l-136 136c-9.2 9.4-24.4 9.4-33.8 0z\"><\/path><\/svg><\/div>\n<div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element tve_no_icons\" style=\"overflow: hidden; border-radius: 0px !important;\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5407\"><div class=\"tcb-plain-text\" style=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5401\">Table of Contents<\/div><\/div>\n<\/div><\/div><div class=\"tve-cb tve-toc-content\">\n<div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve-toc-list tcb-no-delete tcb-no-save tcb-no-clone tve-no-dropzone\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fe\" style=\"\" data-styled-scrollbar=\"0\">\n<div class=\"tve-content-box-background\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53ff\" style=\"\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"tve-cb\" style=\"\">\n<div class=\"tve_ct_content tve_clearfix\"><div class=\"ct_column\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve-toc-heading tve-toc-heading-level0 tve_no_icons\" data-tag=\"H2\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5408\" data-element-name=\"Heading Level 1\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve-toc-number tve-toc-number0 tve_no_icons tve-jump-scroll\" data-target=\"#t-1693157637445\" jump-animation=\"smooth\" data-element-name=\"Number Level 1\" data-level=\"0\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5403\"><span class=\"tve-toc-disabled\">1.<\/span><\/div><a href=\"#t-1693157637445\" class=\"tve-toc-anchor tve-jump-scroll\" jump-animation=\"smooth\">Relationship myth 1: Arguments are like a cleansing thunderstorm!<\/a><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve-toc-heading tve-toc-heading-level0 tve_no_icons\" data-tag=\"H2\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5408\" data-element-name=\"Heading Level 1\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve-toc-number tve-toc-number0 tve_no_icons tve-jump-scroll\" data-target=\"#t-1693157637446\" jump-animation=\"smooth\" data-element-name=\"Number Level 1\" data-level=\"0\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5403\"><span class=\"tve-toc-disabled\">2.<\/span><\/div><a href=\"#t-1693157637446\" class=\"tve-toc-anchor tve-jump-scroll\" jump-animation=\"smooth\">Relationship myth 2: The partner as a lightning rod<\/a><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve-toc-heading tve-toc-heading-level0 tve_no_icons\" data-tag=\"H2\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5408\" data-element-name=\"Heading Level 1\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve-toc-number tve-toc-number0 tve_no_icons tve-jump-scroll\" data-target=\"#t-1693157637447\" jump-animation=\"smooth\" data-element-name=\"Number Level 1\" data-level=\"0\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5403\"><span class=\"tve-toc-disabled\">3.<\/span><\/div><a href=\"#t-1693157637447\" class=\"tve-toc-anchor tve-jump-scroll\" jump-animation=\"smooth\">Relationship myth 3: Problems must always be discussed.<\/a><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve-toc-heading tve-toc-heading-level0 tve_no_icons\" data-tag=\"H2\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5408\" data-element-name=\"Heading Level 1\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve-toc-number tve-toc-number0 tve_no_icons tve-jump-scroll\" data-target=\"#t-1693157637448\" jump-animation=\"smooth\" data-element-name=\"Number Level 1\" data-level=\"0\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5403\"><span class=\"tve-toc-disabled\">4.<\/span><\/div><a href=\"#t-1693157637448\" class=\"tve-toc-anchor tve-jump-scroll\" jump-animation=\"smooth\">Relationship myth 4: Solve the problems first!<\/a><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve-toc-heading tve-toc-heading-level0 tve_no_icons\" data-tag=\"H2\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5408\" data-element-name=\"Heading Level 1\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve-toc-number tve-toc-number0 tve_no_icons tve-jump-scroll\" data-target=\"#t-1693157637449\" jump-animation=\"smooth\" data-element-name=\"Number Level 1\" data-level=\"0\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5403\"><span class=\"tve-toc-disabled\">5.<\/span><\/div><a href=\"#t-1693157637449\" class=\"tve-toc-anchor tve-jump-scroll\" jump-animation=\"smooth\">Relationship myth 5: The past must be dealt with!<\/a><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve-toc-heading tve-toc-heading-level0 tve_no_icons\" data-tag=\"H2\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5408\" data-element-name=\"Heading Level 1\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve-toc-number tve-toc-number0 tve_no_icons tve-jump-scroll\" data-target=\"#t-1693157637450\" jump-animation=\"smooth\" data-element-name=\"Number Level 1\" data-level=\"0\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5403\"><span class=\"tve-toc-disabled\">6.<\/span><\/div><a href=\"#t-1693157637450\" class=\"tve-toc-anchor tve-jump-scroll\" jump-animation=\"smooth\">Relationship myth 6: My criticism is only well-intentioned!<\/a><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve-toc-heading tve-toc-heading-level0 tve_no_icons\" data-tag=\"H2\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5408\" data-element-name=\"Heading Level 1\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve-toc-number tve-toc-number0 tve_no_icons tve-jump-scroll\" data-target=\"#t-1693157637451\" jump-animation=\"smooth\" data-element-name=\"Number Level 1\" data-level=\"0\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5403\"><span class=\"tve-toc-disabled\">7.<\/span><\/div><a href=\"#t-1693157637451\" class=\"tve-toc-anchor tve-jump-scroll\" jump-animation=\"smooth\">Relationship myth 7: Control is better than trust.<\/a><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve-toc-heading tve-toc-heading-level0 tve_no_icons\" data-tag=\"H2\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5408\" data-element-name=\"Heading Level 1\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve-toc-number tve-toc-number0 tve_no_icons tve-jump-scroll\" data-target=\"#t-1693157637452\" jump-animation=\"smooth\" data-element-name=\"Number Level 1\" data-level=\"0\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5403\"><span class=\"tve-toc-disabled\">8.<\/span><\/div><a href=\"#t-1693157637452\" class=\"tve-toc-anchor tve-jump-scroll\" jump-animation=\"smooth\">Relationship myth 8: It's better to be sparing with compliments and praise.<\/a><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve-toc-heading tve-toc-heading-level0 tve_no_icons\" data-tag=\"H2\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5408\" data-element-name=\"Heading Level 1\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve-toc-number tve-toc-number0 tve_no_icons tve-jump-scroll\" data-target=\"#t-1693157637453\" jump-animation=\"smooth\" data-element-name=\"Number Level 1\" data-level=\"0\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5403\"><span class=\"tve-toc-disabled\">9.<\/span><\/div><a href=\"#t-1693157637453\" class=\"tve-toc-anchor tve-jump-scroll\" jump-animation=\"smooth\">Relationship myth 9: My partner needs to sense what I need.<\/a><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve-toc-heading tve-toc-heading-level0 tve_no_icons\" data-tag=\"H2\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5408\" data-element-name=\"Heading Level 1\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve-toc-number tve-toc-number0 tve_no_icons tve-jump-scroll\" data-target=\"#t-1693157637454\" jump-animation=\"smooth\" data-element-name=\"Number Level 1\" data-level=\"0\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5403\"><span class=\"tve-toc-disabled\">10.<\/span><\/div><a href=\"#t-1693157637454\" class=\"tve-toc-anchor tve-jump-scroll\" jump-animation=\"smooth\">Relationship myth 10: Why always me?<\/a><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve-toc-heading tve-toc-heading-level0 tve_no_icons\" data-tag=\"H2\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5408\" data-element-name=\"Heading Level 1\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve-toc-number tve-toc-number0 tve_no_icons tve-jump-scroll\" data-target=\"#t-1698411056061\" jump-animation=\"smooth\" data-element-name=\"Number Level 1\" data-level=\"0\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5403\"><span class=\"tve-toc-disabled\">11.<\/span><\/div><a href=\"#t-1698411056061\" class=\"tve-toc-anchor tve-jump-scroll\" jump-animation=\"smooth\">Relationship myth 11: Affection is either there \u2013 or it isn't.<\/a><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve-toc-heading tve-toc-heading-level0 tve_no_icons\" data-tag=\"H2\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5408\" data-element-name=\"Heading Level 1\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve-toc-number tve-toc-number0 tve_no_icons tve-jump-scroll\" data-target=\"#t-1693058012268\" jump-animation=\"smooth\" data-element-name=\"Number Level 1\" data-level=\"0\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5403\"><span class=\"tve-toc-disabled\">12.<\/span><\/div><a href=\"#t-1693058012268\" class=\"tve-toc-anchor tve-jump-scroll\" jump-animation=\"smooth\">Test: Wie gut funktioniert Ihre Beziehung wirklich?<\/a><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve-toc-heading tve-toc-heading-level0 tve_no_icons\" data-tag=\"H2\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5408\" data-element-name=\"Heading Level 1\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve-toc-number tve-toc-number0 tve_no_icons tve-jump-scroll\" data-target=\"#t-1690967237765\" jump-animation=\"smooth\" data-element-name=\"Number Level 1\" data-level=\"0\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5403\"><span class=\"tve-toc-disabled\">13.<\/span><\/div><a href=\"#t-1690967237765\" class=\"tve-toc-anchor tve-jump-scroll\" jump-animation=\"smooth\">Frequently Asked Questions<\/a><\/div><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv-divider tve-vert-divider\" data-style=\"tve_sep-1\" data-color-d=\"rgb(217, 217, 217)\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5402\" data-style-d=\"tve_sep-4\" data-thickness-d=\"2\"><hr class=\"tve_sep tve_sep-4\" style=\"\"><\/div><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b6a60\" style=\"\" id=\"tve-jump-191fe4dcf5d\"><h2 class=\"\" style=\"\" id=\"t-1693157637445\"><strong>Relationship myth 1: Arguments are like a cleansing thunderstorm!<\/strong><\/h2><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve_image_caption tve-image-caption-below\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18a3810aa6b\" style=\"\"><span class=\"tve_image_frame\"><picture decoding=\"async\" class=\"tve_image tcb-moved-image wp-image-52491\" data-id=\"52491\" data-init-width=\"850\" data-init-height=\"483\" title=\"How relationships work: Relationship myths and arguments\" data-width=\"755\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 850 \/ 483;\" data-css=\"tve-u-19248d7a4ce\" data-height=\"429\" loading=\"lazy\">\n<source type=\"image\/webp\">\n<img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Illustration of a arguing couple, where the man is pointing his finger at his partner.\" data-id=\"52954\" width=\"812\" data-init-width=\"850\" height=\"461\" data-init-height=\"483\" src=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/Wie-Beziehungen-funktionieren-Beziehungsmythos-Streit.webp\" data-width=\"812\" data-css=\"tve-u-18c34d7ded9\" data-height=\"461\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 850 \/ 483;\" class=\"wp-image-52954\" title=\"Argument in relationship\" loading=\"lazy\">\n<\/picture>\n<\/span><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886cc3cafa\"><p><strong>Every argument carries the risk of \"fine cracks\" appearing, which can grow larger with each subsequent argument and ultimately lead to the breakdown of the relationship - because words spoken in anger often hurt deeply and cannot be easily forgotten.<\/strong><\/p><p>If you were given a precious vase as a gift (and isn't your partner, your love, your own relationship among the most precious things in your life?), you wouldn't just casually hit it in passing, even in a bad mood \u2013 and then sooner or later wonder why the beautiful vase broke, needed to be glued, and would never be undamaged again...<\/p><p>IMPORTANT! This does NOT mean that happy relationships cannot and should not contain controversies, differing needs, differing opinions, heated discussions, honesty (even if it is uncomfortable for both partners), etc.<\/p><p><strong>BUT:<\/strong><\/p><ul class=\"\"><li><strong>Conflict is not the solution.<\/strong><\/li><li><strong>Conflict should not be considered \"normal\".<\/strong><\/li><li><strong><em>There is no such thing as a culture<\/em> of conflict &nbsp;.<\/strong><\/li><\/ul><p>Relationships need other forms of joint conflict resolution, which should be used as early as possible \u2013 namely when couples still have trust in each other and respect for one another \u2013 and not only when anger and resentment are so great that conflict can no longer be avoided.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886cc43a43\"><h2 class=\"\" style=\"\" id=\"t-1693157637446\"><strong>Relationship myth 2: The partner as a lightning rod<\/strong><\/h2><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve_image_caption tve-image-caption-below\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18a3812052b\" style=\"\"><span class=\"tve_image_frame\"><picture decoding=\"async\" class=\"tve_image tcb-moved-image wp-image-49154\" data-id=\"49154\" data-init-width=\"850\" data-init-height=\"483\" title=\"How relationships work: Relationship hurt\" data-width=\"755\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 850 \/ 483;\" data-css=\"tve-u-19248edc835\" data-height=\"429\" loading=\"lazy\">\n<source type=\"image\/webp\">\n<img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Illustration of a disappointed, heartbroken couple contemplating separation, with the woman squatting.\" data-id=\"55980\" width=\"812\" data-init-width=\"768\" height=\"461\" data-init-height=\"432\" src=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/03\/Folgen-emotionaler-Abhaengigkeit.jpg\" data-width=\"812\" data-css=\"tve-u-18c34d7f101\" data-height=\"461\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 768 \/ 432;\" class=\"wp-image-55980\" title=\"Consequences of emotional dependency\" loading=\"lazy\">\n<\/picture>\n<\/span><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886cc3cafa\"><p>\"You have to pull yourself together everywhere \u2013 in a long-term relationship, it's simply unavoidable that sooner or later your partner will become a lightning rod...\"<\/p><p><strong>The convention of not regularly \"letting loose\" in social interactions, striving for respect, and initially \"holding oneself back\" has its good reason<\/strong> :<\/p><ul class=\"\"><li>In a work context, one would be dismissed as quickly as possible or no longer \"booked\".<\/li><li>In a friendship context, one would have had friends for the longest time.<\/li><\/ul><p>Why shouldn't that also apply to couples? Can behaving like a madman towards your partner really have no consequences? It's not set in stone that the other person has to love you forever and retain their positive feelings \u2013 no matter how you behave or what you do.<\/p><p><strong>A relationship is precious and needs to be treated with care!<\/strong><\/p><p>It is the responsibility of each individual to consider where and how they can get rid of excess negative energies before turning to their partner.<\/p><p>But how can we \u2013 whether man or woman, older or younger, recently or long together \u2013 learn not to freak out towards our partner, even when we are very upset?<\/p><p>What does it take to control strong emotions like anger and frustration, to remain respectful to one another, not to use the other as a lightning rod \u2013 and to do so over years and decades?<\/p><ul class=\"\"><li>Perhaps a classic punching bag, relentlessly pounded for a quarter of an hour, might help in between? A sweaty jog in the park? A cold shower?<\/li><\/ul><ul class=\"\"><li>Or a phone call with your best friend, who for years has instantly understood what's getting to you: whether it's worries about the kids, complaining about your own weaknesses, whether you need to vent about your boss's unfairness again, or just generally grumble about being stuck in a terribly exhausting phase with an incredibly annoying daily routine.<\/li><\/ul><ul class=\"\"><li>Perhaps it's nice to see our most relaxed friend enjoying an after-work beer: the one who doesn't need anything explained to him and yet always has a fitting remark. The one who's immediately ready to philosophize about life together and chat all night long.<\/li><\/ul><p>After that, the partner will certainly no longer receive the whole negative \"packet\" unfiltered.<\/p><p><strong>When dealing with sensitive issues in a relationship, the rule is: only strike when they're no longer extremely hot! In other words: cool down instead of stirring things up!<\/strong><\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886cc43a43\"><h2 class=\"\" style=\"\" id=\"t-1693157637447\"><strong>Relationship myth 3: Problems must always be discussed.<\/strong><\/h2><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve_image_caption tve-image-caption-below\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18a381325e5\" style=\"\"><span class=\"tve_image_frame\"><picture decoding=\"async\" class=\"tve_image tcb-moved-image wp-image-49155\" data-id=\"49155\" data-init-width=\"850\" data-init-height=\"483\" title=\"How relationships work: Should problems always be discussed?\" data-width=\"755\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 850 \/ 483;\" data-css=\"tve-u-19248ff1599\" data-height=\"429\" loading=\"lazy\">\n<source type=\"image\/webp\">\n<img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Drawing of a couple sitting confused on a sofa, talking uncertainly about their relationship, with speech bubbles\" data-id=\"49072\" width=\"812\" data-init-width=\"850\" height=\"461\" data-init-height=\"483\" src=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/Beziehung-retten-Gespraech.jpg\" data-width=\"812\" data-css=\"tve-u-18c34d819d3\" data-height=\"461\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 850 \/ 483;\" class=\"wp-image-49072\" title=\"Saving a relationship through communication\" loading=\"lazy\">\n<\/picture>\n<\/span><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886cc3cafa\"><p><strong>Talking a lot doesn't automatically lead to solving problems! Often, people keep circling back to the same issues for a very long time \u2013 and as a result, the problems are either cemented or even made disproportionately large instead of being softened and resolved.<\/strong><\/p><p>Important when a couple talks to each other about their different needs:<\/p><ul class=\"\"><li>Remain open to <em>truly<\/em> new and unconventional solutions, or a good compromise \u2013 otherwise, there's a risk that everyone already thinks they know what the best possible solution looks like. Instead of listening attentively to the other person, you'll be mentally gathering your own counterarguments (while your partner is speaking).<\/li><li>A compromise is only good if it hurts both sides (a little).<\/li><li>If a 'problem' arises from a personality trait of one partner (e.g., \"Why are you always so quiet (and not bubbly and extroverted)?!\" or \"Your slowness is driving me crazy! Please, for goodness' sake, talk a little faster...\" or similar), the likelihood of resolving this problem together is extremely low. Blaming your partner's quirks or weaknesses helps no one and certainly won't lead to renewed feelings of closeness or happiness after this harsh confrontation.<\/li><\/ul><p><strong>To all those who want to have a long, happy relationship: Put more energy into accepting your partner's quirks or small weaknesses instead of trying to change them by force (because that won't work anyway!).&nbsp;<\/strong><\/p><p>Most couples report that both partners immediately felt closer to each other again and had the feeling \u2013 sometimes after years! \u2013 that they could finally have open conversations again as soon as it was clarified that they no longer wanted to 're-educate' each other, but would instead address the question together in an empathetic way of what might be good for their relationship.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886cc43a43\"><h2 class=\"\" style=\"\" id=\"t-1693157637448\"><strong>Relationship myth 4: Solve the problems first!<\/strong><\/h2><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve_image_caption tve-image-caption-below\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18a38151d35\" style=\"\"><span class=\"tve_image_frame\"><picture decoding=\"async\" class=\"tve_image tcb-moved-image wp-image-49156\" data-id=\"49156\" data-init-width=\"850\" data-init-height=\"478\" title=\"How relationships work: Solve problems first?\" data-width=\"755\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 850 \/ 478;\" data-css=\"tve-u-1924b045711\" data-height=\"424\" loading=\"lazy\">\n<source type=\"image\/webp\">\n<img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Sketch of a couple sitting silently opposite each other at a table with a lightning cloud between them\" data-id=\"49131\" width=\"812\" data-init-width=\"850\" height=\"457\" data-init-height=\"478\" src=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/Soll-ich-mich-trennen-Klarheit-Entscheidung.jpg\" data-width=\"812\" data-css=\"tve-u-18c34d82d0d\" data-height=\"457\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 850 \/ 478;\" class=\"wp-image-49131\" title=\"Decision to end relationship\" loading=\"lazy\">\n<\/picture>\n<\/span><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886cc3cafa\"><p><em>\"First<\/em> &nbsp;we have to solve our problems \u2013&nbsp; <em>then<\/em> &nbsp;we can (maybe) have a better time together again \u2013 and one day have what is understood as a <em>happy relationship<\/em> .\"<\/p><p>A very common misconception! Because it's exactly the opposite:<\/p><p><strong>Only when the atmosphere in the relationship is (again) somewhat relaxed and both partners can experience untroubled togetherness, is each partner willing to listen to what could make the other happy and satisfied - and does not automatically tune out when the partner expresses concrete wishes for change.<\/strong><\/p><p>Then there is also no risk that both partners in the relationship will defend themselves and come up with their own points of criticism as soon as they feel criticized themselves.<\/p><p><strong>The archaic mechanism of flight or defense is at work in all kinds of relationships:<\/strong><\/p><p>Anyone who feels cornered by their partner will either flee or strike back. And that's exactly what a sentence like \"We need to talk!\" immediately triggers.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886cc43a43\"><h2 class=\"\" style=\"\" id=\"t-1693157637449\"><strong>Relationship myth 5: The past must be dealt with!<\/strong><\/h2><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve_image_caption tve-image-caption-below\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18a38160400\" style=\"\"><span class=\"tve_image_frame\"><picture decoding=\"async\" class=\"tve_image tcb-moved-image wp-image-49157\" data-id=\"49157\" data-init-width=\"850\" data-init-height=\"483\" title=\"How relationships work: Does the past always need to be dealt with?\" data-width=\"755\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 850 \/ 483;\" data-css=\"tve-u-1924e982027\" data-height=\"429\" loading=\"lazy\">\n<source type=\"image\/webp\">\n<img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Sketch of a couple sitting separately, reflecting on conflicts in their relationship, with a thought bubble.\" data-id=\"49157\" width=\"812\" data-init-width=\"850\" height=\"461\" data-init-height=\"483\" src=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/Wie-Beziehungen-funktionieren-Vergangenes-muss-aufgearbeitet-werden.jpg\" data-width=\"812\" data-css=\"tve-u-18c34d854d5\" data-height=\"461\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 850 \/ 483;\" class=\"wp-image-49157\" title=\"Relationship conflicts\" loading=\"lazy\">\n<\/picture>\n<\/span><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886cc3cafa\"><p><strong>Life happens <em>every day<\/em> !<\/strong><\/p><p>Those who constantly cling to the past and continually focus their attention on negative past experiences in the relationship lose sight of the present and fail to create positive opportunities day after day.<\/p><p><strong>But positive experiences are the stuff that every happy relationship is made of: They need to counterbalance unpleasant experiences from the past.<\/strong><\/p><p>In most cases, the far better strategy is to repeatedly strive to let unpleasant situations that lie in the past and can no longer be changed remain in the past, to sort them into a kind of imaginary \"past box\" and actively close them.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886cc43a43\"><h2 class=\"\" style=\"\" id=\"t-1693157637450\"><strong>Relationship myth 6: My criticism is only well-intentioned!<\/strong><\/h2><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve_image_caption tve-image-caption-below\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18a3816c928\" style=\"\"><span class=\"tve_image_frame\"><picture decoding=\"async\" class=\"tve_image tcb-moved-image wp-image-49158\" data-id=\"49158\" data-init-width=\"850\" data-init-height=\"483\" title=\"How relationships work: Well-intentioned criticism\" data-width=\"755\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 850 \/ 483;\" data-css=\"tve-u-1924b054d0f\" data-height=\"429\" loading=\"lazy\">\n<source type=\"image\/webp\">\n<img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Sketch of a woman criticizing her overweight partner on the scales with a dumbbell and tennis racket.\" data-id=\"49158\" width=\"812\" data-init-width=\"850\" height=\"461\" data-init-height=\"483\" src=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/Wie-Beziehungen-funktionieren-Kritik.jpg\" data-width=\"812\" data-css=\"tve-u-18c34d86955\" data-height=\"461\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 850 \/ 483;\" class=\"wp-image-49158\" title=\"Criticizing your partner\" loading=\"lazy\">\n<\/picture>\n<\/span><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886cc3cafa\"><p>I only mean well when I occasionally remind my husband\/wife that he\/she should lose weight\/stop smoking\/do more exercise\/dress differently\/present themselves better (...).<\/p><p>First of all, you can of course wish for ANYTHING:<\/p><ul class=\"\"><li>That your partner, who has become chubby, loses 15 kilos and will be standing in front of you with a six-pack in a few weeks.<\/li><li>That the unathletic partner goes to the gym 3 times a week so that a joint mountain tour can finally work out.<\/li><li>That the partner, exhausted over the weekend, goes out on the town with someone on Saturday Night until dawn \u2013 and what else\u2026<\/li><\/ul><p>BUT: It is nowhere written that all our wishes must be fulfilled. And certainly not when they primarily concern the transformation of another person.<\/p><p><strong>Everyone must complete their own personal development \u2013 at their own pace, ideally without too much external pressure, trusting that they will be liked as a \"complete package\" \u2013 including their own weaknesses.<\/strong><\/p><p>Otherwise, so-called \"reactance\" is created, i.e., even if the partner knows that our suggestions\/wishes are generally good, important and correct (losing weight, quitting smoking, drinking less alcohol, doing more exercise, becoming more sociable, etc.):<\/p><p>If he is repeatedly confronted by US with these requests for change in the relationship (with labels like: \"I'm just worried,\" \"I just want honesty between us!\"), the likelihood increases rapidly that he will not change in the direction we hope for - because he experiences our requests and reminders (even if they were intended by us as support) as pressure and not (anymore) as primarily his own concern.<\/p><p>All those who make their subjectively perceived relationship quality (\"we have an overall happy relationship\" versus \"things aren't going well in our relationship\") dependent on whether or at what pace the partner's supposed weaknesses change, will most likely never be able to enjoy their relationship unclouded.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886cc43a43\" id=\"tve-jump-191fe4e2d1b\"><h2 class=\"\" style=\"\" id=\"t-1693157637451\"><strong>Relationship myth 7: Control is better than trust.<\/strong><\/h2><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve_image_caption tve-image-caption-below\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18a3817903c\" style=\"\"><span class=\"tve_image_frame\"><picture decoding=\"async\" class=\"tve_image tcb-moved-image wp-image-49159\" data-id=\"49159\" data-init-width=\"850\" data-init-height=\"483\" title=\"How relationships work: Is control better than trust?\" data-width=\"755\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 850 \/ 483;\" data-css=\"tve-u-1924e93952e\" data-height=\"429\" loading=\"lazy\">\n<source type=\"image\/webp\">\n<img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Illustration of a man searching for evidence of his wife's affair and infidelity.\" data-id=\"52932\" width=\"812\" data-init-width=\"850\" height=\"461\" data-init-height=\"483\" src=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/Phasen-einer-Affaere-Phase-5.webp\" data-width=\"812\" data-css=\"tve-u-18c34d88e59\" data-height=\"461\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 850 \/ 483;\" class=\"wp-image-52932\" title=\"Keeping affairs and infidelity secret\" loading=\"lazy\">\n<\/picture>\n<\/span><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886cc3cafa\"><p>If we spy on our loved one (checking their phone, eavesdropping on phone calls, secretly reading emails, subtly questioning their friends, etc.) and they somehow find out, a potentially deep rift in the relationship can quickly develop, because:<\/p><p><strong>Love is a child of freedom.<\/strong><\/p><p>We all wish that the other person is \"voluntarily\" and happily loyal to us and of their own volition, and therefore does nothing that could seriously endanger the relationship.<\/p><p>If our partner feels monitored and perceives our default setting as \"distrust and suspicion\" instead of \" <a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/vertrauen\/\">trust<\/a> and, in case of doubt, for the accused,\" then exactly what we wanted to avoid happens in our relationship:<\/p><p><strong>The other person is annoyed. Feels misunderstood. Becomes emotionally distant from us.<\/strong><\/p><p>Eventually, he will seek recognition elsewhere. And perhaps \u2013 if he is already constantly suspected of infidelity \u2013 he will embark on an affair ( <a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/affaere-verzeihen\/\" class=\"\" style=\"outline: none;\">see also the article \"Forgiving infidelity\"<\/a> ).<\/p><p>Therefore, when we&nbsp; are plagued <a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/eifersucht-bekaempfen\/\" class=\"\" style=\"outline: none;\">by jealousy and fear of loss<\/a> &nbsp;, it is a misguided belief to think:<\/p><p>In this relationship, we simply need to make the enclosure nice and small and easy to navigate, and secure the exit well \u2013 then we will have lifelong control over the creature we love and it will never be lost to us!<\/p><p>That might work with a guinea pig. But with our partner? Never ever!<\/p><p>The tighter we draw the fence around the person we love, the more likely it becomes that they will one day break free from the relationship. Completely. And then forever. Because they have been deprived of space to move around and the air to breathe.<\/p><p><strong>Holding on to what we love at all costs \u2013 that doesn't work in a relationship.<\/strong><\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886cc43a43\"><h2 class=\"\" style=\"\" id=\"t-1693157637452\"><strong>Relationship myth 8: It's better to be sparing with compliments and praise.<\/strong><\/h2><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve_image_caption tve-image-caption-below\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18a381830cc\" style=\"\"><span class=\"tve_image_frame\"><picture decoding=\"async\" class=\"tve_image tcb-moved-image wp-image-49160\" data-id=\"49160\" data-init-width=\"850\" data-init-height=\"483\" title=\"How relationships work: compliments and praise\" data-width=\"755\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 850 \/ 483;\" data-css=\"tve-u-1924ea1be71\" data-height=\"429\" loading=\"lazy\">\n<source type=\"image\/webp\">\n<img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Man with hearts in a thought bubble kneels before woman, showing her affection in the relationship.\" data-id=\"49019\" width=\"812\" data-init-width=\"850\" height=\"461\" data-init-height=\"483\" src=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/Toxische-Beziehung-Love-Bombing.jpg\" data-width=\"812\" data-css=\"tve-u-18c34d8a0fe\" data-height=\"461\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 850 \/ 483;\" class=\"wp-image-49019\" title=\"Love bombing in a toxic relationship\" loading=\"lazy\">\n<\/picture>\n<\/span><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886cc3cafa\"><p>\"One should be sparing with compliments and praise \u2013 otherwise the other person will become desensitized.\"<\/p><p>Everyone benefits from recognition and appreciation. And everyone is happy when they hear and feel that the other person sees, appreciates, and puts into words their own efforts and good qualities.<\/p><p><strong>So, there is no reason NOT to be generous with compliments and praise.<\/strong><\/p><p>Aside from the fact that it does us good and lifts our mood when we focus our attention on the positive aspects of the other person instead of waiting for what is NOT perfect about them, the other person is involuntarily and constantly reinforced in maintaining and perhaps even expanding their good qualities\u2026<\/p><p><strong>If appreciation for the other person is lacking, there is a high risk that our partner will gradually cease making efforts<\/strong> (\"She\/He doesn't see it anyway...\") \u2013 so that the relationship threatens to become increasingly loveless. This increases the risk of seeking validation elsewhere.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886cc43a43\"><h2 id=\"t-1693157637453\" class=\"\"><strong>Relationship myth 9: My partner needs to sense what I need.<\/strong><\/h2><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve_image_caption tve-image-caption-below\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18a38195f9f\" style=\"\"><span class=\"tve_image_frame\"><picture decoding=\"async\" class=\"tve_image tcb-moved-image wp-image-49161\" data-id=\"49161\" data-init-width=\"850\" data-init-height=\"483\" title=\"How relationships work: Blind understanding?\" data-width=\"755\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 850 \/ 483;\" data-css=\"tve-u-1924ea50de4\" data-height=\"429\" loading=\"lazy\">\n<source type=\"image\/webp\">\n<img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Sketch of a man and woman standing angrily with their backs to each other and keeping their distance.\" data-id=\"57375\" width=\"812\" data-init-width=\"768\" height=\"461\" data-init-height=\"436\" src=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/05\/Fremdgehen-Beziehung-Kommunikation.jpg\" data-width=\"812\" data-css=\"tve-u-18c34d8c542\" data-height=\"461\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 768 \/ 436;\" class=\"wp-image-57375\" title=\"Infidelity, relationship, communication\" loading=\"lazy\">\n<\/picture>\n<\/span><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886cc3cafa\"><p>What an amazingly persistent misconception!<\/p><p>\"The other person should know me well enough to instinctively sense what I want, what makes me happy, what I need in any given situation \u2013 especially since I already told him so explicitly 23 years ago. After all, he claims to love me. If I have to give him a subtle hint, I can't truly appreciate anything my partner does. Other couples understand each other perfectly well without words.\"<\/p><p>However, when two individuals come together in a relationship, they each already carry their own specific baggage in their respective \"biographical\" backpacks.<\/p><ul class=\"\"><li>Experiences from one's own childhood,<\/li><li>Memories of the parents' relationship,<\/li><li>various personal relationship experiences<\/li><li>Assumptions about how much of what is needed for a happy relationship (sex, trust, being together, brutal honesty, shared events, meeting other couples, etc.)<\/li><\/ul><p><strong>As a result, there are often very different ideas about how to show someone you like them.<\/strong><\/p><p>Example:&nbsp; <strong>Declarations of love<\/strong><\/p><ul class=\"\"><li>the one: in words<\/li><li>the other: through gifts<\/li><li>Yet another: by taking work off the other person's hands.<\/li><\/ul><p>Example:&nbsp; <strong>One of them is troubled<\/strong><\/p><ul class=\"\"><li>One person: to take their partner in their arms and comfort them.<\/li><li>The other: consciously leaving the partner alone<\/li><li>A third option: Trying to distract the partner<\/li><\/ul><p>Example:&nbsp; <strong>Support during stress<\/strong><\/p><ul class=\"\"><li>One: Asking questions and listening.<\/li><li>The other: to come up with concrete solutions.<\/li><li>A third option: offer relaxation opportunities for in-between moments<\/li><\/ul><p>Even if a couple supposedly knows each other very well:<\/p><p><strong>It is always astonishing to see in which areas significant differences still exist between partners even after many years of relationship, and how surprised both are when these differences are finally explicitly addressed<\/strong> .<\/p><p>\"Yes, that's actually true... now that you mention it... I've never thought of it that way before, that it's really also a kind of declaration of love that you've been fishing my long hair out of the drain every day for years without complaint, because I never do that myself... ahem...\" or:<\/p><p>\"Okay. From now on, I won't try to pressure you to regularly TELL me you love me, but I'll try to see other signs (like hugging me or entertaining the kids early on weekend mornings so I can sleep in) as expressions of love... I'm just not used to that from before. In my family, everyone always TOLD each other how they felt. That's why I was always waiting to HEAR more from you...\"<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886cc43a43\"><h2 class=\"\" style=\"\" id=\"t-1693157637454\"><strong>Relationship myth 10: Why always me?<\/strong><\/h2><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve_image_caption tve-image-caption-below\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18a381a2577\" style=\"\"><span class=\"tve_image_frame\"><picture decoding=\"async\" class=\"tve_image tcb-moved-image wp-image-49162\" data-id=\"49162\" data-init-width=\"850\" data-init-height=\"483\" title=\"How relationships work: Why do I always have to do something?\" data-width=\"755\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 850 \/ 483;\" data-css=\"tve-u-1924ea9a5da\" data-height=\"429\" loading=\"lazy\">\n<source type=\"image\/webp\">\n<img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Sketch of a woman holding a bag of anger and rage, thinking about the argument with her partner\" data-id=\"49122\" width=\"812\" data-init-width=\"850\" height=\"461\" data-init-height=\"483\" src=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/Staendiger-Streit-in-der-Beziehung-Streiten-alleine-geht-nicht.png\" data-width=\"812\" data-css=\"tve-u-18c34d8db34\" data-height=\"461\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 850 \/ 483;\" class=\"wp-image-49122\" title=\"Constant arguments in the relationship\" loading=\"lazy\">\n<\/picture>\n<\/span><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886cc3cafa\"><p>\"If I always have to make the first effort, the relationship can't be good.\"<\/p><p>YOU are the only person you can change. So why wait for the other person to make the first move and get annoyed in the meantime? Why not repeatedly model the way you want to be treated?<\/p><p><strong>The \u2013 often defiant \u2013 attitude: \u201cWhy me again? It\u2019s the other person\u2019s turn now!\u201d is frequently the reason why an unfavorable status quo persists unnecessarily long (sometimes for years) and both remain in a bad atmosphere.<\/strong><\/p><p>However, if ONE of them starts to (again) take the initiative and approaches the other in a benevolent and loving manner, the other will most likely follow suit a short time later.<\/p><p>This is the principle of so-called \"reciprocity.\" And surprisingly, it works even when the partnership has been plagued by problems for a long time\u2026<\/p><p>The only important condition, however, is that you must consistently and consistently switch to \"positive interaction\" for - ideally - SEVERAL days in a row - and not be friendly and loving for a few hours, then complain or snipe in between, then be a little nice again and then badmouth the other person again...<\/p><p>Otherwise, the partner \u2013 quite rightly \u2013 does not truly believe that a lasting and genuinely positive development has begun, but remains suspicious, stays \"on guard\" and does not enter the new positive spiral himself.<\/p><p><strong>Erich Fromm summed up this principle in the following words: The richer person can give more.<\/strong><\/p><p>In other words: Whenever you are the \"richer\" one (i.e., you realized more quickly that something needed to be changed, etc.) -&gt; you should give! (i.e., do something without waiting too long...)<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886cc43a43\" id=\"tve-jump-191fe4e73d5\"><h2 class=\"\" style=\"\" id=\"t-1698411056061\"><strong>Relationship myth 11: Affection is either there \u2013 or it isn't.<\/strong><\/h2><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve_image_caption tve-image-caption-below\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18a381ac862\" style=\"\"><span class=\"tve_image_frame\"><picture decoding=\"async\" class=\"tve_image tcb-moved-image wp-image-49163\" data-id=\"49163\" data-init-width=\"850\" data-init-height=\"483\" title=\"How relationships work: Affection is either there \u2013 or it isn't.\" data-width=\"755\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 850 \/ 483;\" data-css=\"tve-u-18fa5ff4786\" data-height=\"429\" loading=\"lazy\">\n<source type=\"image\/webp\">\n<img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Illustration of a couple sitting apart and sadly on the couch, thinking.\" data-id=\"52977\" width=\"812\" data-init-width=\"850\" height=\"461\" data-init-height=\"483\" src=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/Trennung-auf-Zeit-gemeinsame-Absprachen.webp\" data-width=\"812\" data-css=\"tve-u-18c34d9075a\" data-height=\"461\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 850 \/ 483;\" class=\"wp-image-52977\" title=\"When a temporary separation makes sense\" loading=\"lazy\">\n<\/picture>\n<\/span><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886cc3cafa\"><p>A common misconception among many couples is that once love is gone, it's lost forever. There's really nothing you can do about it.<\/p><p>HALT!<\/p><p><strong>If one consciously and deliberately strives to create a loving atmosphere and a supportive approach, the seemingly lost affection can very well return<\/strong> ( <a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/beziehungskrise-meistern\/\" class=\"\" style=\"outline: none;\">see also the article \"Overcoming a Relationship Crisis\"<\/a> ).<\/p><p>Humans are creatures of attachment \u2013 that is, shared history makes people feel bound to their partners.<\/p><p><strong>And once a bond has formed, it doesn't disappear completely so easily. Shared experiences forge a strong connection<\/strong> \u2013 and the accompanying feeling of belonging and affection can usually be rekindled by most couples if they manage to approach each other with more friendliness and interest, listen to one another, consciously remember challenges overcome together, and\/or make an effort to create beautiful shared experiences in the here and now.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886cc43a43\"><h2 class=\"\" style=\"\" id=\"t-1693058012268\"><strong>Test: Wie gut funktioniert Ihre Beziehung wirklich?<\/strong><\/h2><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886cc3cafa\"><p>Mehr zum Thema Wir-Gef\u00fchl, Positiva und Herausforderungen in Ihrer Beziehung erfahren Sie in unserem wissenschaftlich entwickelten Partnerschaftstest (kostenfrei), der bereits von vielen tausend Paaren genutzt wurde.<\/p><p>Falls Sie den Test noch nicht gemacht haben sollten und wir noch kein (gratis) Beziehungsprofil f\u00fcr Sie erstellen konnten:<\/p><p>Gewinnen Sie jetzt Klarheit dar\u00fcber, wie gut Ihre Beziehung tats\u00e4chlich \"funktioniert\".<\/p><p>Treten Sie einen Schritt zur\u00fcck und analysieren Sie Ihre Liebe aus der Vogelperspektive.<\/p><p><strong>Sobald Sie einen konkreten \u00dcberblick dar\u00fcber haben, wie Sie Ihre Partnerschaft&nbsp;<em>erleben<\/em>&nbsp;und wie Sie sie selbst&nbsp;<em>gestalten<\/em>, werden Sie einen viel sch\u00e4rferen Blick auf Ihre gemeinsamen Ressourcen und Herausforderungen gewinnen.<\/strong><\/p><p>Es wird Sie etwa 10 Minuten Zeit kosten, die Fragen auszuf\u00fcllen.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"tcb-clear\" data-css=\"tve-u-18c87c54aaa\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_contentbox_shortcode thrv-content-box tve-elem-default-pad\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18ba3d4a54e\" style=\"\">\n<div class=\"tve-content-box-background\" style=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18ba3d4a540\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"tve-cb\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886cc62a1c\" style=\"\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-18ba3d4a542\" style=\"text-align: center;\">Machen Sie jetzt Ihren Beziehungstest! (kostenfrei)<\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18ba3d4a551\" style=\"\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-18ba3d4a545\" style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>Wie steht es um Ihre Beziehung?<br>Was sind Ihre St\u00e4rken &amp; Schw\u00e4chen?<\/strong><\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv-columns\" style=\"--tcb-col-el-width: 512;\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18ba3d4a54c\"><div class=\"tcb-flex-row v-2 tcb--cols--2 tcb-resized\" style=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18ba3d4a543\"><div class=\"tcb-flex-col c-33\" style=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18ba3d4a54d\"><div class=\"tcb-col\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886ccb1283\" style=\"\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper tve_image_caption\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18ba3d4a541\" style=\"\"><span class=\"tve_image_frame\"><picture decoding=\"async\" class=\"tve_image wp-image-424 tcb-moved-image\" data-id=\"424\" data-init-width=\"1000\" data-init-height=\"1000\" title=\"Relationship profile\" data-width=\"204\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 1000 \/ 1000;\" data-css=\"tve-u-1924eadebb5\" data-height=\"204\" loading=\"lazy\">\n<source type=\"image\/webp\">\n<img decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Image of the personal relationship profile from the PaarBalance relationship test\" data-id=\"53041\" data-init-width=\"1000\" data-init-height=\"1000\" src=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/09\/beziehungsprofil.webp\" data-width=\"212\" data-css=\"tve-u-189b52d0ef2\" data-height=\"212\" width=\"212\" height=\"212\" style=\"aspect-ratio: auto 1000 \/ 1000;\" class=\"wp-image-53041\" title=\"Relationship profile Relationship test\" loading=\"lazy\">\n<\/picture>\n<\/span><\/div><\/div><\/div><div class=\"tcb-flex-col c-66\" style=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18ba3d4a550\"><div class=\"tcb-col\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18ba3d4a553\" style=\"\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-18ba3d4a546\">Das erfahren Sie sofort im Anschluss in Ihrem pers\u00f6nlichen PaarBalance-Beziehungsprofil (gratis).<\/p><p data-css=\"tve-u-18ba3d4a546\"><strong>Starten Sie jetzt mit dem Beziehungstest!<\/strong><\/p><p data-css=\"tve-u-18ba3d4a547\" style=\"\">\u2713 Wissenschaftlich fundiert<br>\u2713 Inklusive detaillierter Auswertung<br>\u2713 Keine Weitergabe Ihrer Daten<br>\u2713 100% gratis &amp; unverbindlich<\/p><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv-button thrv-button-v2 tcb-local-vars-root tcb-flip\" data-css=\"tve-u-18ba3d4a548\" data-type=\"\" data-tcb_hover_state_parent=\"\" style=\"\">\n<div class=\"thrive-colors-palette-config\" style=\"display: none !important\">__CONFIG_colors_palette__{\"active_palette\":0,\"config\":{\"colors\":{\"62516\":{\"name\":\"Main Accent\",\"parent\":-1}},\"gradients\":[]},\"palettes\":[{\"name\":\"Default Palette\",\"value\":{\"colors\":{\"62516\":{\"val\":\"var(--tcb-color-0)\"}},\"gradients\":[]}}]}__CONFIG_colors_palette__<\/div>\n<a href=\"https:\/\/app.paarbalance.de\/beziehungstest\" class=\"tcb-button-link tcb-plain-text\" style=\"\" target=\"_blank\"><span class=\"tcb-button-icon\">\n<div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_icon tve_no_drag tve_no_icons tcb-icon-inherit-style tcb-local-vars-root tcb-icon-display\" data-css=\"tve-u-18ba3d4a549\" data-tcb_hover_state_parent=\"\" style=\"\"><svg class=\"tcb-icon\" viewBox=\"0 0 512 512\" data-id=\"icon-arrow-circle-right-solid\" data-name=\"\"><path d=\"M256 8c137 0 248 111 248 248S393 504 256 504 8 393 8 256 119 8 256 8zm-28.9 143.6l75.5 72.4H120c-13.3 0-24 10.7-24 24v16c0 13.3 10.7 24 24 24h182.6l-75.5 72.4c-9.7 9.3-9.9 24.8-.4 34.3l11 10.9c9.4 9.4 24.6 9.4 33.9 0L404.3 273c9.4-9.4 9.4-24.6 0-33.9L271.6 106.3c-9.4-9.4-24.6-9.4-33.9 0l-11 10.9c-9.5 9.6-9.3 25.1.4 34.4z\"><\/path><\/svg><\/div>\n<\/span>\n<span class=\"tcb-button-texts\"><span class=\"tcb-button-text thrv-inline-text\" data-css=\"tve-u-18ba3d4a54a\" style=\"\"><strong>Jetzt mit dem kostenfreien Beziehungstest starten<\/strong><\/span><span class=\"tcb-secondary-text thrv-inline-text tve-froala fr-box\" data-css=\"tve-u-18ba3d4a54b\" style=\"\"><\/span><\/span>\n<\/a>\n<\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18ba3d4a554\" style=\"\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-18ba3d4a54f\" style=\"text-align: center;\"><small>100% sicher. Wir halten uns an den Datenschutz. &nbsp;Die Anmeldung f\u00fcr den Beziehungstest ist <span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">kostenlos<\/span>.<br>Bitte lesen Sie zuvor diese wichtigen Informationen:<\/small><br><a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/datenschutzerklaerung\/\" target=\"_blank\" class=\"\" style=\"outline: none;\"><small>Datenschutz<\/small><\/a><small>&nbsp;\u1427 <\/small><a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/agb\/\" target=\"_blank\" class=\"\" style=\"outline: none;\"><small>AGB<\/small><\/a><small>&nbsp;\u1427 <\/small><a href=\"\/en\/allgemeine-informationsvertragsbedingungen\/\" target=\"_blank\" class=\"\" style=\"outline: none;\"><small>Allgemeine Informationsvertragsbedingungen<\/small><\/a><small>&nbsp;. <\/small><a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/04\/Transparenzerklaerung.pdf\" target=\"_blank\" class=\"\" style=\"outline: none;\"><small>Transparenzerkl\u00e4rung<\/small><\/a><\/p><\/div><\/div>\n<\/div><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886cc3cafa\"><p>Alles Gute f\u00fcr Sie und Ihre Beziehung!<\/p><p>Ihre <a href=\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/dr-judith-gastner\/\" class=\"\" style=\"outline: none;\">Dr. Judith Gastner<\/a><\/p><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_contentbox_shortcode thrv-content-box tve-elem-default-pad\" data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508819\" style=\"\">\n\t<div class=\"tve-content-box-background\" style=\"--tve-border-width: 0px; border: none !important;\" data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508818\"><\/div>\n\t<div class=\"tve-cb\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\"><p data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881a\" style=\"\"><strong>Passende Artikel zum Thema \"Wie Beziehungen funktionieren\"<\/strong><\/p><\/div>[tcb_post_list query=\"{'paged':1,'filter':'custom','post_type':|{|'post'|}|,'related':|{||}|,'orderby':'date','order':'DESC','posts_per_page':'3','offset':'1','no_posts_text':'There are no posts to display.','exclude_current_post':|{||}|,'queried_object':{'ID':33630,'post_author':'3'},'dynamic_filter':{'category':'category','tag':'tag','author':'author','search':'search'},'sticky':|{||}|,'rules':|{|{'taxonomy':'post','terms':|{|'36324'|}|,'operator':'IN'},{'taxonomy':'post','terms':|{|'50568'|}|,'operator':'IN'},{'taxonomy':'post','terms':|{|'36733'|}|,'operator':'IN'}|}|}\" type=\"list\" columns-d=\"1\" columns-t=\"1\" columns-m=\"1\" vertical-space-d=\"0\" horizontal-space-d=\"30\" ct=\"post_list-43533\" ct-name=\"Image &amp; Text 12\" tcb-elem-type=\"post_list\" pagination-type=\"none\" pages_near_current=\"2\" dynamic_filter='{\"category\":\"category\",\"tag\":\"tag\",\"author\":\"author\",\"search\":\"search\"}' element-name=\"Post List\" css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\" no_posts_text=\"There are no posts to display.\" article-tcb_hover_state_parent=\"\" total_post_count=\"3\" total_sticky_count=\"0\" posts_per_page=\"3\" featured-content=\"0\" disabled-links=\"1\"  class='' article-tcb_hover_state_parent='' article-class='tve_evt_manager_listen tve_ea_thrive_animation tve_et_mouseover tve_anim_sweep_to_bottom' ][tcb_post_list_dynamic_style]@media (min-width: 300px){[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list #post-[tcb_the_id] [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508822\"]{background-image: url(\"[tcb_featured_image_url size=medium]\") !important;}[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list #post-[tcb_the_id] [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508823\"]:hover [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508822\"]{background-image: url(\"[tcb_featured_image_url size=medium]\") !important;}}[\/tcb_post_list_dynamic_style]\n<div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv-columns\" data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881f\" style=\"--tcb-col-el-width: 522;\"><div class=\"tcb-flex-row tcb-resized tcb-medium-no-wrap v-2 m-edit tcb-desktop-no-wrap tcb--cols--2 tcb-mobile-no-wrap\" data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881e\" style=\"\"><div class=\"tcb-flex-col\" data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881c\" style=\"\"><div class=\"tcb-col\" data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508826\" style=\"\"><a href=\"[tcb_post_the_permalink]\" class=\"tve-dynamic-link\" dynamic-postlink=\"tcb_post_the_permalink\" data-shortcode-id=\"50568\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_contentbox_shortcode thrv-content-box tve-elem-default-pad tcb-local-vars-root tcb-mobile-hidden\" data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508823\" style=\"\">\n\t<div class=\"tve-content-box-background\" data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508822\" style=\"\" data-tcb_hover_state_parent=\"1\"><\/div>\n\t<div class=\"tve-cb\" data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508824\" style=\"\"><\/div>\n<\/div><\/a><\/div><\/div><div class=\"tcb-flex-col\" data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881d\" style=\"\"><div class=\"tcb-col\" style=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508828\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" style=\"\"><h4 class=\"tve-id-regenerated\" id=\"t-1732202011743\" style=\"\"><span class=\"thrive-shortcode-content\" data-shortcode=\"tcb_post_title\" data-shortcode-name=\"Post title\" data-extra_key=\"\" data-attr-link=\"1\" data-attr-target=\"0\" data-attr-rel=\"0\" data-option-inline=\"1\" data-attr-static-link=\"{&quot;className&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/beziehungstest\/&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;Relationship test (free \u2013 10 min.): How is my relationship doing?&quot;,&quot;class&quot;:&quot;&quot;}\" data-attr-css=\"\" style=\"text-decoration: underline;\" data-css=\"tve-u-194860c77ee\">[tcb_post_title link='1' target='0' rel='0' inline='1' static-link='{\"className\":\"\",\"href\":\"https:\/\/www.paarbalance.de\/en\/beziehungstest\/\",\"title\":\"Relationship test (free \u2013 10 min.): How is my relationship doing?\",\"class\":\"\"}' css='']<\/span><\/h4><\/div>[tcb_post_content size='excerpt' read_more='' words='15' css='tve-u-191fe508821']\n\t\n<\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n[\/tcb_post_list]<\/div>\n<\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv-divider\" data-style-d=\"tve_sep-1\" data-thickness-d=\"1\" data-color-d=\"rgb(0, 62, 125)\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18a8da65e5d\">\n<hr class=\"tve_sep tve_sep-1\" style=\"\">\n<\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18861460bbb\"><h2 class=\"\" id=\"t-1690967237765\">Frequently Asked Questions<\/h2><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_contentbox_shortcode thrv-content-box tve-elem-default-pad\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18861432048\">\n<div class=\"tve-content-box-background\" data-css=\"tve-u-18a8da68b96\" style=\"--tve-border-width: 1px;\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"tve-cb\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\"><h3 class=\"\" style=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18a8da68b97\" id=\"t-1685450315605\"><strong><strong><strong><strong>How do I find the right partner?<\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/h3><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886137ae7d\"><p style=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18a8da68b99\">What constitutes a fulfilling relationship for you: shared interests, a similar sense of humor, tenderness and sex, the same values, a sense of family, or a thirst for adventure? Those who know themselves and understand where they could readily accept personal differences and where they probably couldn't have a good chance of finding the 'right' partner... and keeping them.<\/p><\/div><\/div>\n<\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_contentbox_shortcode thrv-content-box tve-elem-default-pad\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18861432048\">\n<div class=\"tve-content-box-background\" data-css=\"tve-u-18a8da68b96\" style=\"--tve-border-width: 1px;\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"tve-cb\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\"><h3 class=\"\" style=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18a8da68b97\" id=\"t-1698411056062\"><strong><strong><strong><strong><strong>How important is communication in a relationship?<\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/h3><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886137ae7d\"><p style=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18a8da68b99\">Communication is a fundamental building block of happy relationships. Open exchange and the desire to get to know and understand each other better form the basis for establishing a deep connection and overcoming challenges together. In addition to verbal communication, nonverbal communication also plays a significant role.<\/p><\/div><\/div>\n<\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_contentbox_shortcode thrv-content-box tve-elem-default-pad\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18861432048\">\n<div class=\"tve-content-box-background\" data-css=\"tve-u-18a8da68b96\" style=\"--tve-border-width: 1px;\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"tve-cb\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\"><h3 class=\"\" style=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18a8da68b97\" id=\"t-1698411056063\"><strong><strong><strong><strong><strong><strong>What does it take to overcome relationship conflicts?<\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/h3><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886137ae7d\"><p style=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18a8da68b99\">The key usually lies in approaching areas of conflict with an open mind: What does each person want? Could the solution lie in a \"both-and\" rather than an \"either-or\"? Is this about principle or about a constructive compromise? If a couple treats each other with respect, then successfully resolved conflicts contribute to strengthening their relationship.<\/p><\/div><\/div>\n<\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_contentbox_shortcode thrv-content-box tve-elem-default-pad\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18861432048\">\n<div class=\"tve-content-box-background\" data-css=\"tve-u-18a8da68b96\" style=\"--tve-border-width: 1px;\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"tve-cb\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\"><h3 class=\"\" style=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18a8da68b97\" id=\"t-1698411056064\"><strong><strong><strong><strong><strong><strong><strong>What are the secrets to a happy relationship?<\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/h3><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886137ae7d\"><p style=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18a8da68b99\">Unfortunately, there's no magic formula for relationship happiness. However, research on couples has identified variables that form the basis for partnership satisfaction. These include: respect and openness; the ability to take responsibility for one's own happiness, to apologize, forgive, and let go; a willingness to compromise; and goodwill.<\/p><\/div><\/div>\n<\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_contentbox_shortcode thrv-content-box tve-elem-default-pad\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18861432048\">\n<div class=\"tve-content-box-background\" data-css=\"tve-u-18a8da68b96\" style=\"--tve-border-width: 1px;\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"tve-cb\"><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\"><h3 class=\"\" style=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18a8da68b97\" id=\"t-1698411056065\"><strong><strong><strong><strong><strong><strong><strong><strong>What harms a relationship?<\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/h3><\/div><div class=\"thrv_wrapper thrv_text_element\" data-type=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-1886137ae7d\"><p style=\"\" data-css=\"tve-u-18a8da68b99\">Lack of honesty, frequent arguments, or a loveless tone can severely damage a relationship in the long run. However, if both partners are genuinely interested in improving their relationship, even a partnership perceived as unhappy can quickly change for the better. Often, only a few adjustments are needed.<\/p><\/div><\/div>\n<\/div>","tve_custom_css":"@import url(\"\/\/fonts.googleapis.com\/css?family=Mulish:300,700,400,800,500&subset=latin\");@import url(\"\/\/fonts.googleapis.com\/css?family=Noto+Sans:400,700,500&subset=latin\");@media (min-width: 300px){[data-css=\"tve-u-18a3810aa6b\"] { width: 100%; margin-top: 0px !important; margin-bottom: 40px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-18a3812052b\"] { width: 100%; margin-top: 0px !important; margin-bottom: 40px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-18a381325e5\"] { width: 100%; margin-top: 0px !important; margin-bottom: 40px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-18a38151d35\"] { width: 100%; margin-top: 0px !important; margin-bottom: 40px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-18a38160400\"] { width: 100%; margin-top: 0px !important; margin-bottom: 40px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-18a3816c928\"] { width: 100%; margin-top: 0px !important; margin-bottom: 40px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-18a3817903c\"] { width: 100%; 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--tcb-applied-color: var$(--tcb-local-color-a027f) !important; text-decoration: var(--tve-text-decoration,underline) !important; --tve-text-decoration: underline !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53f9\"].tve-state-expanded { color: var(--tve-color,var(--tcb-local-color-a027f)); --tve-color: var(--tcb-local-color-a027f); --tcb-applied-color: var$(--tcb-local-color-a027f); background-image: linear-gradient(rgb(239, 239, 239), rgb(239, 239, 239)) !important; background-size: auto !important; background-position: 50% 50% !important; background-attachment: scroll !important; background-repeat: no-repeat !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fb\"] { --tve-toc-indent: 15px; max-width: 100%; float: none; --tcb-local-color-f1170: rgba(65,178,233,0.7); position: relative; display: block; overflow: hidden; padding-right: 1px !important; margin: 30px auto 0px !important; --tcb-local-color-a027f: rgba(0,93,255,0.05) !important; --tcb-local-color-21e68: rgb(184,211,255) !important; --tve-applied-max-width: 100% !important; z-index: 3 !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fb\"] .tve-toc-title-icon { color: rgb(255, 255, 255) !important; font-size: 15px !important; width: 15px !important; height: 15px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fc\"] { --tve-border-width: 0px; --tve-border-radius: 0px; background-image: none !important; border-radius: 0px !important; border-width: medium !important; border-style: none !important; border-color: currentcolor !important; border-image: initial !important; --tve-applied-border: none !important; --background-image: none !important; --tve-applied-background-image: none !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fd\"] { --tve-font-weight: var(--g-bold-weight,bold); --tve-color: rgb(255,255,255); --tve-applied---tve-color: rgb(255,255,255); --tve-font-size: 16px; border-top-left-radius: 10px; border-top-right-radius: 10px; overflow: hidden; border-bottom-right-radius: 0px !important; border-bottom-left-radius: 0px !important; background-image: linear-gradient(var(--tcb-local-color-a027f),var(--tcb-local-color-a027f)) !important; background-size: auto !important; background-position: 50% 50% !important; background-attachment: scroll !important; background-repeat: no-repeat !important; --tve-applied-background-image: linear-gradient(var$(--tcb-local-color-a027f),var$(--tcb-local-color-a027f)) !important; padding: 17px 15px 12px 5px !important; margin-bottom: 0px !important; margin-top: 0px !important; z-index: 3 !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fd\"] p, :not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fd\"] li, :not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fd\"] blockquote, :not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fd\"] address, :not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fd\"] .tcb-plain-text, :not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fd\"] label { font-weight: var(--tve-font-weight,var(--g-bold-weight,bold)); font-size: var(--tve-font-size,16px); }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fd\"] p, :not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fd\"] li, :not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fd\"] blockquote, :not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fd\"] address, :not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fd\"] .tcb-plain-text, :not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fd\"] label, :not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fd\"] h1, :not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fd\"] h2, :not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fd\"] h3, :not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fd\"] h4, :not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fd\"] h5, :not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fd\"] h6 { color: var(--tve-color,rgb(255,255,255)); --tve-applied-color: var$(--tve-color,rgb(255,255,255)); --tcb-applied-color: rgb(255,255,255); }[data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fe\"] { overflow: visible; padding: 0px 15px 10px 5px !important; margin-bottom: 0px !important; margin-top: 0px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53ff\"] { overflow: hidden; border-radius: 0px 0px 12px 12px !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53ff\"] { background-image: none !important; --background-image: none !important; --tve-applied-background-image: none !important; background-color: rgba(0, 93, 255, 0.05) !important; --background-color: rgba(0,93,255,0.05) !important; --tve-applied-background-color: rgba(0,93,255,0.05) !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fd\"] > .tve-content-box-background { background-image: none !important; --tve-applied-background-image: none !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fd\"].tve-state-expanded > .tve-content-box-background { background-image: none !important; --tve-applied-background-image: none !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fd\"].tve-state-expanded { overflow: hidden; --animation-angle: -90deg; border-bottom-right-radius: 10px !important; border-bottom-left-radius: 10px !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fd\"]:hover:not(.tve-state-expanded) { border-bottom-right-radius: 0px !important; overflow: hidden !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5401\"] { line-height: 1.2em !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5402\"] .tve_sep { background-image: url(\"data:image\/svg+xml,%3Csvg viewBox='0 0 12 2' xmlns='http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg' transform='rotate(90)'%3E%3Cline x1='0' y1='1' x2='12' y2='1' stroke='rgb(217,217,217)' stroke-dasharray='4' stroke-width='3' \/%3E%3C\/svg%3E\"); --tve-applied-background-image: url(\"data:image\/svg+xml,%3Csvg viewBox='0 0 12 2' xmlns='http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg' transform='rotate(90)'%3E%3Cline x1='0' y1='1' x2='12' y2='1' stroke='rgb(217,217,217)' stroke-dasharray='4' stroke-width='3' \/%3E%3C\/svg%3E\"); background-size: 2px 2px; background-position: center top; width: 2px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fd\"].tve-state-expanded .tve-toc-title-icon { font-size: 15px !important; width: 15px !important; height: 15px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5403\"] { padding: 0px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5404\"] { padding: 0px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5405\"] { padding: 0px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5406\"] { --g-regular-weight: 400; --g-bold-weight: 700; border-width: medium medium 2px; border-style: none none dotted; border-color: currentcolor currentcolor rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.1); border-image: initial; font-size: var(--tve-font-size,16px); --tve-font-size: 16px; color: var(--tve-color,rgb(80,80,80)); --tve-color: rgb(80,80,80); --tcb-applied-color: rgb(80,80,80); font-weight: var(--tve-font-weight,var(--g-regular-weight,normal)); --tve-font-weight: var(--g-regular-weight,normal); line-height: var(--tve-line-height,1.4em); --tve-line-height: 1.4em; --tve-applied-color: var$(--tve-color,rgb(80,80,80)); --tve-applied---tve-color: rgb(80,80,80); padding: 8px 15px !important; background-image: none !important; margin-bottom: 0px !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5406\"]:hover { color: var(--tve-color,var(--tcb-local-color-a027f)) !important; --tve-color: var(--tcb-local-color-a027f) !important; --tcb-applied-color: var$(--tcb-local-color-a027f) !important; text-decoration: var(--tve-text-decoration,underline) !important; --tve-text-decoration: underline !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5406\"].tve-state-expanded { color: var(--tve-color,var(--tcb-local-color-a027f)); --tve-color: var(--tcb-local-color-a027f); --tcb-applied-color: var$(--tcb-local-color-a027f); border-left-width: medium; border-left-style: none; border-left-color: currentcolor; background-image: linear-gradient(rgb(239, 239, 239), rgb(239, 239, 239)) !important; background-size: auto !important; background-position: 50% 50% !important; background-attachment: scroll !important; background-repeat: no-repeat !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5401\"] { --g-regular-weight: 300; --g-bold-weight: 700; color: var(--tcb-color-7) !important; --tcb-applied-color: var$(--tcb-color-7) !important; --tve-applied-color: var$(--tcb-color-7) !important; font-family: Mulish !important; font-size: 18px !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5401\"] strong { font-weight: 700 !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fd\"] .tve-toc-title-icon { color: var(--tcb-color-7) !important; --tve-applied-color: var$(--tcb-color-7) !important; font-size: 18px !important; width: 18px !important; height: 18px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5407\"] { padding-left: 20px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fe\"] > .tve-cb { display: block; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b53fb\"] > .tve-cb { display: block; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5408\"] { --g-regular-weight: 300; --g-bold-weight: 700; border-width: medium; border-style: none; border-color: currentcolor; border-image: initial; font-size: var(--tve-font-size,16px); --tve-font-size: 16px; color: var(--tve-color,var(--tcb-color-7)); --tve-color: var(--tcb-color-7); --tcb-applied-color: var$(--tcb-color-7); font-weight: var(--tve-font-weight,var(--g-regular-weight,normal)); --tve-font-weight: var(--g-regular-weight,normal); line-height: var(--tve-line-height,1.4em); --tve-line-height: 1.4em; --tve-border-width: 0px; --tve-applied-border: none; font-family: var(--tve-font-family,Mulish); --tve-font-family: Mulish; --tve-applied-color: var$(--tve-color,var$(--tcb-color-7)); --tve-applied---tve-color: var$(--tcb-color-7); text-decoration: var(--tve-text-decoration,underline); --tve-text-decoration: underline; padding: 5px 15px !important; margin-top: 0px !important; margin-bottom: 2px !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5408\"]:hover { color: var(--tve-color,rgb(23,67,120)) !important; --tve-color: rgb(23,67,120) !important; --tcb-applied-color: rgb(23,67,120) !important; --tve-applied-color: var$(--tve-color,rgb(23,67,120)) !important; --tve-applied---tve-color: rgb(23,67,120) !important; font-weight: var(--tve-font-weight,var(--g-regular-weight,normal)) !important; --tve-font-weight: var(--g-regular-weight,normal) !important; text-decoration: var(--tve-text-decoration,underline) !important; --tve-text-decoration: underline !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b5408\"].tve-state-expanded { color: var(--tve-color,var(--tcb-local-color-a027f)); --tve-color: var(--tcb-local-color-a027f); --tcb-applied-color: var$(--tcb-local-color-a027f); border-left: 2px solid var(--tcb-local-color-f1170); background-image: linear-gradient(rgb(239, 239, 239), rgb(239, 239, 239)) !important; background-size: auto !important; background-position: 50% 50% !important; background-attachment: scroll !important; background-repeat: no-repeat !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191d89b6a60\"] { margin-top: 20px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe46e843\"] { --tve-border-radius: 5px; border-radius: 5px; overflow: hidden; box-shadow: none; --tve-applied-box-shadow: none; --tve-border-width: 0px; background-color: rgba(0, 93, 255, 0.05) !important; --background-color: rgba(0,93,255,0.05) !important; --tve-applied-background-color: rgba(0,93,255,0.05) !important; border-width: medium !important; border-style: none !important; border-color: currentcolor !important; border-image: initial !important; --tve-applied-border: none !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe46e844\"] { max-width: 100%; margin-top: 0px !important; padding: 15px 15px 10px !important; margin-bottom: 0px !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe46e845\"] { padding-bottom: 10px !important; margin-bottom: 0px !important; font-size: 18px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe46e846\"] { margin-top: 0px !important; padding-top: 0px !important; padding-bottom: 0px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe46e847\"] { padding-bottom: 0px !important; padding-top: 0px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe46e848\"] { line-height: 1.5em !important; padding-top: 6px !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe46e846\"] li { margin-bottom: 10px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508818\"] { --tve-border-radius: 5px; border-radius: 5px; overflow: hidden; box-shadow: none; --tve-applied-box-shadow: none; --tve-border-width: 0px; background-color: rgba(0, 93, 255, 0.05) !important; --background-color: rgba(0,93,255,0.05) !important; --tve-applied-background-color: rgba(0,93,255,0.05) !important; border-width: medium !important; border-style: none !important; border-color: currentcolor !important; border-image: initial !important; --tve-applied-border: none !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508819\"] { margin-top: 0px !important; padding: 15px 15px 10px !important; margin-bottom: 0px !important; z-index: 10 !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881a\"] { padding-bottom: 10px !important; margin-bottom: 0px !important; font-size: 18px !important; line-height: 1.6em !important; }.tcb-post-list[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"] .post-wrapper.thrv_wrapper { width: calc(100% + 0px); }.tcb-post-list[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"] .post-wrapper.thrv_wrapper:nth-child(n+2) { margin-top: 0px !important; }.tcb-post-list[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"] .post-wrapper.thrv_wrapper:not(:nth-child(n+2)) { margin-top: 0px !important; }.tcb-post-list[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"] .post-wrapper.thrv_wrapper:nth-child(n) { margin-right: 0px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"] { border-radius: 0px; overflow: hidden; margin: 0px !important; padding: 0px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881c\"] { max-width: 17.1992%; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881d\"] { max-width: 82.7971%; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881e\"] { margin-left: -30px !important; padding: 0px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881f\"] { margin: 0px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881e\"] > .tcb-flex-col { padding-left: 30px; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list .post-wrapper { border-bottom-width: medium; border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-color: currentcolor; border-top-width: medium; border-top-style: none; border-top-color: currentcolor; --tve-border-width: 0px; padding: 5px 0px !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list .post-wrapper:hover { background-color: rgba(183, 183, 183, 0.05) !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list .post-wrapper::after { background-attachment: scroll; background-image: none; background-position: 0% 0%; background-repeat: repeat; background-size: auto; background-color: rgba(183, 183, 183, 0.05) !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508821\"] { --tve-font-size: 14px; margin-top: 0px !important; margin-bottom: 0px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508822\"] { border-radius: 5px; overflow: hidden; --tve-border-radius: 5px; background-image: url(\"[tcb_featured_image_url size=medium]\") !important; --background-image: url(\"[tcb_featured_image_url size=medium]\") !important; --tve-applied-background-image: none !important; background-size: cover !important; background-position: 50% 50% !important; background-attachment: scroll !important; background-repeat: no-repeat !important; --background-size: cover !important; --background-position: 50% 50% !important; --background-attachment: scroll !important; --background-repeat: no-repeat !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508823\"] { width: 230px; float: none; max-width: 105px; margin: 0px auto !important; padding: 0px !important; --tve-applied-max-width: 79% !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list .thrv-content-box [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508824\"] { height: 105px !important; --tve-applied-height: 105px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508823\"]:hover [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508822\"] { background-image: url(\"[tcb_featured_image_url size=medium]\") !important; background-size: cover !important; background-position: 50% 50% !important; background-attachment: scroll !important; background-repeat: no-repeat !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508821\"] p, :not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508821\"] a, :not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508821\"] ul, :not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508821\"] ul > li, :not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508821\"] ol, :not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508821\"] ol > li, :not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508821\"] h1, :not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508821\"] h2, :not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508821\"] h3, :not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508821\"] h4, :not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508821\"] h5, :not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508821\"] h6, :not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508821\"] blockquote > p, :not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508821\"] pre { font-size: var(--tve-font-size,14px); }[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508826\"] { justify-content: flex-start !important; }.tcb-post-list[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"] .post-wrapper.thrv_wrapper:not(:nth-child(n)) { margin-right: 30px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192b08024cc\"] { width: 30px; --tve-alignment: center; float: none; margin-left: auto !important; margin-right: auto !important; margin-top: 20px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192b08024cc\"] img { opacity: 0.7; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea771\"] { --tve-border-radius: 214px; border-radius: 214px; overflow: hidden; width: 45px; position: absolute; top: 8px; left: 0px; margin-top: 5px !important; margin-bottom: 0px !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea773\"] { --g-regular-weight: 300; --g-bold-weight: 700; font-size: 12px !important; color: var(--tcb-skin-color-5) !important; --tcb-applied-color: var$(--tcb-skin-color-5) !important; --tve-applied-color: var$(--tcb-skin-color-5) !important; font-family: Mulish !important; font-weight: var(--g-regular-weight,normal) !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea774\"] { text-decoration-line: none !important; text-decoration-thickness: initial !important; text-decoration-style: initial !important; --eff: none !important; text-decoration-color: var(--eff-color,currentColor) !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea775\"] { padding-bottom: 0px !important; margin-bottom: 0px !important; padding-top: 2px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea776\"] { padding-left: 54px !important; margin-top: 7px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea777\"] { padding-left: 54px !important; padding-top: 1px !important; margin-top: -2px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea778\"] { --tve-border-radius: 5px; border-radius: 5px; overflow: hidden; background-color: transparent !important; --background-color: transparent !important; --tve-applied-background-color: transparent !important; justify-content: center !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea779\"] { margin-top: 0px !important; margin-bottom: 0px !important; padding: 0px 10px 10px 15px !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea77a\"] { text-shadow: none; --tve-applied-text-shadow: none; --g-regular-weight: 300; --g-bold-weight: 700; font-size: 14px !important; color: var(--tcb-skin-color-5) !important; --tcb-applied-color: var$(--tcb-skin-color-5) !important; --tve-applied-color: var$(--tcb-skin-color-5) !important; line-height: 1.75em !important; font-family: Mulish !important; padding-bottom: 0px !important; margin-bottom: 0px !important; font-weight: var(--g-regular-weight,normal) !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea77b\"] { --tcb-applied-color: var$(--tcb-skin-color-5) !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea77c\"] { --g-regular-weight: 300; --g-bold-weight: 700; font-weight: var(--g-bold-weight,bold) !important; font-family: Mulish !important; text-decoration-line: none !important; text-decoration-thickness: initial !important; text-decoration-style: initial !important; text-decoration-color: var(--tcb-text-decoration-color,initial) !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea77d\"] { color: var(--tcb-skin-color-0) !important; --tcb-applied-color: var$(--tcb-skin-color-0) !important; --tve-applied-color: var$(--tcb-skin-color-0) !important; font-size: 14px !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea77e\"] { font-weight: var(--g-bold-weight,bold) !important; box-shadow: none !important; border-bottom-width: medium !important; border-bottom-style: none !important; border-bottom-color: currentcolor !important; background: none !important; text-decoration: none !important; transition: none !important; padding-left: 0px !important; --eff: none !important; --tve-applied-box-shadow: none !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea77e\"]:hover { text-decoration: none !important; background: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; --tve-applied-box-shadow: none !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea77f\"] { text-shadow: none; --tve-applied-text-shadow: none; --g-regular-weight: 300; --g-bold-weight: 700; font-size: 14px !important; color: var(--tcb-skin-color-5) !important; --tcb-applied-color: var$(--tcb-skin-color-5) !important; --tve-applied-color: var$(--tcb-skin-color-5) !important; line-height: 1.75em !important; font-family: Mulish !important; padding-bottom: 0px !important; margin-bottom: 0px !important; font-weight: var(--g-regular-weight,normal) !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea780\"] { max-width: 50%; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea781\"] { background-color: rgb(248, 248, 248) !important; --background-color: rgb(248,248,248) !important; --tve-applied-background-color: rgb(248,248,248) !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea782\"] { --tve-border-radius: 5px; border-radius: 5px; overflow: hidden; background-color: rgb(248, 248, 248) !important; --background-color: rgb(248,248,248) !important; --tve-applied-background-color: rgb(248,248,248) !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea77f\"] strong { font-weight: 700 !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea783\"] { margin-top: 0px !important; margin-bottom: 0px !important; padding: 5px 10px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea784\"] { padding-bottom: 0px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea785\"] { max-width: unset; --tve-border-top-left-radius: 5px; border-top-left-radius: 5px; overflow: hidden; --tve-border-top-right-radius: 5px; border-top-right-radius: 5px; --tve-applied-max-width: unset !important; margin-top: 0px !important; margin-bottom: 0px !important; background-color: var(--tcb-color-8) !important; --background-color: var(--tcb-color-8) !important; --tve-applied-background-color: var$(--tcb-color-8) !important; margin-right: 20px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea786\"] { max-width: 50%; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea787\"] { --tve-border-radius: 5px; border-radius: 5px; overflow: hidden; background-color: transparent !important; --background-color: transparent !important; --tve-applied-background-color: transparent !important; padding-top: 0px !important; justify-content: center !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea788\"] .tve_sep { width: 100%; border-width: 2px !important; border-color: rgb(255, 255, 255) !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea788\"] { max-width: unset; --tve-applied-max-width: unset !important; padding-top: 15px !important; padding-bottom: 0px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea789\"] .tve_sep { width: 100%; border-width: 2px !important; border-color: rgb(255, 255, 255) !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbea789\"] { padding-top: 15px !important; padding-bottom: 0px !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebea6\"] { --g-regular-weight: 300; --g-bold-weight: 700; font-size: 12px !important; color: var(--tcb-skin-color-5) !important; --tcb-applied-color: var$(--tcb-skin-color-5) !important; --tve-applied-color: var$(--tcb-skin-color-5) !important; font-family: Mulish !important; font-weight: var(--g-regular-weight,normal) !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebea7\"] { font-size: 25px; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; width: 25px; height: 25px; --tcb-local-color-icon: var(--tcb-color-2); --tcb-local-color-var: var$(--tcb-color-2); --tve-icon-size: 25px; border-width: medium; border-style: none; border-color: currentcolor; border-image: initial; border-radius: 0px; --tve-applied-border: none; background-size: auto; background-attachment: scroll, scroll, scroll; background-position: 50% 50%; background-repeat: no-repeat; padding: 0px !important; background-image: none !important; --tve-applied-background-image: none !important; --background-image: none !important; background-color: transparent !important; --background-color: transparent !important; --tve-applied-background-color: transparent !important; margin-top: 0px !important; margin-bottom: 0px !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebea7\"] > :first-child { color: var(--tcb-color-2); --tve-applied-color: var$(--tcb-color-2); }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebea8\"] { --tve-border-radius: 100px; border-radius: 100px; overflow: hidden; background-color: var(--tcb-color-6) !important; --background-color: var(--tcb-color-6) !important; --tve-applied-background-color: var$(--tcb-color-6) !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebea9\"] { float: left; z-index: 3; position: relative; --tve-alignment: left; max-width: 60px; padding: 10px !important; margin: 0px auto 0px 6px !important; --tve-applied-max-width: 60px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeaa\"] { min-height: 25px !important; --tve-applied-min-height: 25px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeab\"] { max-width: 15%; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeac\"] { max-width: 84.9991%; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebead\"] { --tve-border-radius: 5px; border-radius: 5px; overflow: hidden; margin-top: 10px !important; margin-bottom: 0px !important; background-color: rgb(248, 248, 248) !important; --background-color: rgb(248,248,248) !important; --tve-applied-background-color: rgb(248,248,248) !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeae\"] { padding-left: 10px !important; padding-top: 1px !important; margin-top: -2px !important; padding-bottom: 1px !important; margin-bottom: 5px !important; margin-left: 10px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeaf\"] > .tcb-flex-col { padding-left: 0px; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeaf\"] { margin-left: 0px !important; padding-top: 10px !important; padding-bottom: 10px !important; padding-left: 10px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeb0\"]::after { clear: both; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeb1\"] { justify-content: center !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeb2\"] { --tve-border-radius: 5px; border-radius: 5px; overflow: hidden; background-color: transparent !important; --background-color: transparent !important; --tve-applied-background-color: transparent !important; padding-top: 0px !important; justify-content: flex-start !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeb3\"] { max-width: unset; --tve-border-bottom-right-radius: 5px; border-bottom-right-radius: 5px; overflow: hidden; --tve-border-bottom-left-radius: 5px; border-bottom-left-radius: 5px; --tve-applied-max-width: unset !important; margin-top: 0px !important; background-color: var(--tcb-color-8) !important; --background-color: var(--tcb-color-8) !important; --tve-applied-background-color: var$(--tcb-color-8) !important; margin-right: 20px !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeb4\"] { text-shadow: none; --tve-applied-text-shadow: none; --g-regular-weight: 300; --g-bold-weight: 700; font-size: 14px !important; color: var(--tcb-skin-color-5) !important; --tcb-applied-color: var$(--tcb-skin-color-5) !important; --tve-applied-color: var$(--tcb-skin-color-5) !important; line-height: 1.75em !important; font-family: Mulish !important; padding-bottom: 0px !important; margin-bottom: 0px !important; font-weight: var(--g-regular-weight,normal) !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeb5\"] { --tve-border-radius: 5px; border-radius: 5px; overflow: hidden; background-color: rgb(248, 248, 248) !important; --background-color: rgb(248,248,248) !important; --tve-applied-background-color: rgb(248,248,248) !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeb6\"] { max-width: 50%; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeb4\"] strong { font-weight: 700 !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeb7\"] { margin-top: 10px !important; margin-bottom: 0px !important; padding: 5px 10px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeb8\"] { font-size: 22px; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; width: 22px; height: 22px; --tcb-local-color-icon: rgba(10,10,10,0.85); --tcb-local-color-var: rgba(10,10,10,0.85); --tve-icon-size: 22px; float: left; z-index: 3; position: relative; --tve-alignment: left; margin-top: 0px !important; margin-bottom: 0px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeb9\"] { max-width: 20%; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeba\"]::after { clear: both; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebebb\"] { max-width: 20%; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebebc\"] { max-width: 20%; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebebd\"] { max-width: 20%; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebebe\"] { max-width: 20%; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebebf\"] { max-width: unset; --tve-applied-max-width: unset !important; margin-top: 0px !important; margin-bottom: 5px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebec0\"] { padding-top: 3px !important; padding-bottom: 0px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebec1\"] { padding-left: 10px !important; padding-top: 2px !important; margin-top: -2px !important; padding-bottom: 5px !important; margin-left: 10px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebec2\"] { font-size: 22px; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; width: 22px; height: 22px; --tcb-local-color-icon: rgba(10,10,10,0.85); --tcb-local-color-var: rgba(10,10,10,0.85); --tve-icon-size: 22px; float: left; z-index: 3; position: relative; --tve-alignment: left; margin-top: 0px !important; margin-bottom: 0px !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebec2\"]:hover { --tcb-local-color-icon: var(--tcb-color-2) !important; --tcb-local-color-var: var$(--tcb-color-2) !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebec2\"]:hover > :first-child { color: var(--tcb-color-2) !important; --tve-applied-color: var$(--tcb-color-2) !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebec3\"] { font-size: 22px; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; width: 22px; height: 22px; --tcb-local-color-icon: rgba(10,10,10,0.85); --tcb-local-color-var: rgba(10,10,10,0.85); --tve-icon-size: 22px; float: left; z-index: 3; position: relative; --tve-alignment: left; margin-top: 0px !important; margin-bottom: 0px !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebec3\"]:hover { --tcb-local-color-icon: var(--tcb-color-2) !important; --tcb-local-color-var: var$(--tcb-color-2) !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebec3\"]:hover > :first-child { color: var(--tcb-color-2) !important; --tve-applied-color: var$(--tcb-color-2) !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebec5\"] { font-size: 22px; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; width: 22px; height: 22px; --tcb-local-color-icon: rgba(10,10,10,0.85); --tcb-local-color-var: rgba(10,10,10,0.85); --tve-icon-size: 22px; float: left; z-index: 3; position: relative; --tve-alignment: left; margin-top: 0px !important; margin-bottom: 0px !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebec5\"]:hover { --tcb-local-color-icon: var(--tcb-color-2) !important; --tcb-local-color-var: var$(--tcb-color-2) !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebec5\"]:hover > :first-child { color: var(--tcb-color-2) !important; --tve-applied-color: var$(--tcb-color-2) !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebec6\"] { font-size: 22px; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; width: 22px; height: 22px; --tcb-local-color-icon: rgba(10,10,10,0.85); --tcb-local-color-var: rgba(10,10,10,0.85); --tve-icon-size: 22px; float: left; z-index: 3; position: relative; --tve-alignment: left; margin-top: 0px !important; margin-bottom: 0px !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebec6\"]:hover { --tcb-local-color-icon: var(--tcb-color-2) !important; --tcb-local-color-var: var$(--tcb-color-2) !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebec6\"]:hover > :first-child { color: var(--tcb-color-2) !important; --tve-applied-color: var$(--tcb-color-2) !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeb8\"]:hover { --tcb-local-color-icon: var(--tcb-color-2) !important; --tcb-local-color-var: var$(--tcb-color-2) !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeb8\"]:hover > :first-child { color: var(--tcb-color-2) !important; --tve-applied-color: var$(--tcb-color-2) !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebec7\"] { --g-regular-weight: 300; --g-bold-weight: 700; font-size: 14px !important; color: var(--tcb-skin-color-5) !important; --tcb-applied-color: var$(--tcb-skin-color-5) !important; --tve-applied-color: var$(--tcb-skin-color-5) !important; font-family: Mulish !important; font-weight: var(--g-regular-weight,normal) !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebec8\"] { padding-top: 0px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebec9\"] { margin-top: 0px !important; margin-bottom: 0px !important; padding: 0px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebeca\"] { --tve-border-radius: 5px; border-radius: 5px; overflow: hidden; background-color: transparent !important; --background-color: transparent !important; --tve-applied-background-color: transparent !important; justify-content: center !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebecb\"] { padding-bottom: 0px !important; margin-bottom: 0px !important; padding-top: 2px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-192dfbebecc\"] { max-width: 50%; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list [data-css=\"tve-u-194860c77ee\"] { font-size: 16px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list [data-css=\"tve-u-194860c77ee\"] { text-decoration: underline !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-19818e2a3ba\"] .tcb-button-link { letter-spacing: 2px; background-image: linear-gradient(var(--tcb-local-color-62516,rgb(19,114,211)),var(--tcb-local-color-62516,rgb(19,114,211))); --tve-applied-background-image: linear-gradient(var$(--tcb-local-color-62516,rgb(19,114,211)),var$(--tcb-local-color-62516,rgb(19,114,211))); background-size: auto; background-attachment: scroll; border-radius: 5px; padding: 18px; background-position: 50% 50%; background-repeat: no-repeat; background-color: transparent !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-19818e2a3ba\"] .tcb-button-link span { color: rgb(255, 255, 255); --tcb-applied-color: #fff; }[data-css=\"tve-u-19818e2a3ba\"] { --tcb-local-color-62516: var(--tcb-color-0) !important; margin-bottom: 5px !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-19818e2a3bc\"] { --g-regular-weight: 300; --g-bold-weight: 700; font-family: Mulish !important; font-size: 15px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-19818e2a3bc\"] strong { font-weight: 700 !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-19818e2a3bc\"] { font-weight: var(--g-regular-weight,normal) !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-19818e2a3bd\"] { --g-regular-weight: 300; --g-bold-weight: 700; font-family: Mulish !important; font-size: 24px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-19818e2a3bd\"] strong { font-weight: 700 !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-19818e2a3be\"] { min-width: auto; max-width: 758.078px; }[data-css=\"tve-u-19818e2a3bf\"] { background-color: var(--tcb-color-8) !important; --background-color: var(--tcb-color-8) !important; --tve-applied-background-color: var$(--tcb-color-8) !important; }:not(#tve) [data-css=\"tve-u-19818e2a3c0\"] { padding-bottom: 0px !important; margin-bottom: 0px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-19818e2a3c1\"] { margin-bottom: 10px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508828\"] { margin-left: 15px !important; }}@media (max-width: 1023px){.tcb-post-list[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"] .post-wrapper.thrv_wrapper { width: calc(100% + 0px); }.tcb-post-list[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"] .post-wrapper.thrv_wrapper:nth-child(n+2) { margin-top: 0px !important; }.tcb-post-list[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"] .post-wrapper.thrv_wrapper:not(:nth-child(n+2)) { margin-top: 0px !important; }.tcb-post-list[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"] .post-wrapper.thrv_wrapper:nth-child(n) { margin-right: 0px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list .post-wrapper { padding-top: 30px !important; padding-bottom: 30px !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881e\"] { flex-wrap: nowrap !important; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508823\"] { width: 180px; }[data-css=\"tve-u-191fe50881b\"].tcb-post-list .thrv-content-box [data-css=\"tve-u-191fe508824\"] { height: 180px !important; 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